random_text.txt

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I've been neglecting this thread for a bit but I want some more random quotes. Submit some favorites.

What I'm looking for:
- Couple sentences max.
- Is interesting out of context, optimally begs a question.
- Not a quote from me.
- Links to thread where it originates is a huge bonus.

Does not have to reference the Kiwi Farms.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY ETHAN! LOVE YOUR DAD JIM & BEST FRIENDS JOSH, FLAM, AND GATOR. GOOD LUCK ON THE UPCOMING CORN HARVEST!"

 
This thread proves to me that Pentecost is a devil religion and the lord is punishing them for their trans(get it)gressions.

Most women only have two holes down there, he has three! He's a super woman!

"Fanny's pussy horts,"

Nigga got that Taco Bell pussy.

his fake designer pussy is farting uncontrollably how is this not home page worthy?

I'm stealing this one because it was really good.
 
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"BANNED! BANNED! BANNED! BANNED! BANNED! Gone. Forever.

-DSP while wearing a military dictator hat


"When I was a child, other children would punch me in the face, kick me in the kidneys, sic dogs on me, tie me up and throw me down ravines."

-Jake Alley/Cassandra Ocean
 
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Please don’t ask me how I’m doing. I’m literally farting out of my new vagina.
I’d take back the damn dick if I didn't have to pass gas through the damn thing.

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I had my dick turned into a vagina and you haven't messaged once.

all of this is in the OP of the Landon Hiscock aka Fanny Traggot thread


(Just a side note, if your feeling down in the dumps, check this thread out again because holy shit it’s funny)
 
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