The Ethan Ralph Report by Michael Alberto - The Catboi Furrer has comissioned Michael Alberto to compile a report on Ethan Ralph. The autists and archivists of Kiwi Farms are the most capable of providing the necessary information.

To add my contribution to this thread, I think if the primary purpose here is to inform Michael for his report, we need to draw a clear distinction between reasons people hate Ralph and reasons people find him funny.

For example, people do not hate Ralph because he:

-Drinks.
-Is fat.
-Is poor.
-Is white trash.
-Is a retard.
-Gets mad.
-Has a gunt.
-Pops pills.
-Gambles.
-Is from (west) Memphis.
-Got beaten/thumbed by Ronnie.
-Gets beaten up.
-Sounds like a beached dolphin.
-Is short.
-Has a tiny penis.
-Eats poo.
-Eats trashburgers.
-Farts on cam.
-Lives in crackshacks.
-Lives in Mexico.
-Fucks a clout horse.

These things are funny, we laugh at them.

People DO hate Ralph because he:

-Posted revenge porn.
-Lies about people.
-Is a hypocrite.
-Blasphemes/fake Christian.
-Kills dogs.
-Threatens people.
-Flags people.
-Doxes people.
-Is a smug cunt.
-Was a bully in school.
-Dangerous driving.
-Scams people.
-Steals from churches.
-Punched a cop.
-Manipulates teenage girls.
-Treated his mother like shit.
-Treats his brother like shit.
-Abandoned his son.
-Rapes women.
-Jerks off to children.
-Uses his daughter to flex.

That's not a strict rule of course; I am sure there are people out there who hate Ralph because he is fat or like Ralph because he punched a cop. But in general ayylawgz have a separation between "funny Ralph" and "scumbag Ralph" when shitting on him.

I guess my point is we need Michael to understand there are legitimate reasons people dislike Ralph beyond that he's fat and stupid and eats poo.
 
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TypicalSemite said:
Nick is right, why are you fags so obsessed with Ralph? This entire subforum is basically an Ethan Ralph fan club.
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So? i never got this fan club line btw, ralph calls us alogs because he says (now when its convenient not when he was friendly with josh and making money "alogging" people) that you should have a somewhat friendly view of cows like chris. wouldnt it be good if we were almost a fan forum but with some jokes? Also there are cows i watch that i am fans of. i watch mrenter content. if i did that with ralph id admit it but i havent seen a killstream in ages, its boring, his shit show of a life is highly entertaining. motherfucker might have moved to mexico to avoid niggas throwing corn at him. look me in the fucking eye without cracking a smile and tell me ethan "scurring" at the corn ears to (potentially) fleeing to southern mexico isnt funny and i will delete my account
 
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i do believe that the drunken swine thinks he's being clever.

three days ago, he tweeted about joining rokfin "by their invitation". i sincerely doubt that he was invited to do anything more than submit a content creator application, like everyone else.

1664516060934.png

then yesterday, he tweeted about not returning to odysee, in favor of rumble and rokfin. he included a backhoofed comment about being "stuck" on odysee, but i think that was directed more at null and rekieta, who have been streaming there because of youtube bullshit. his comment about cozytv is contrived solely to deliver criticism.

1664516204177.png

he also takes this photo of his never-bride, her nipples, and her baby ... all the things that fuentes fears and reviles ... and then posts it from meigh's twitter in some kind of attempt to portray her as domesticated and docile. again, contrived as could be, but to what end. is he looking for more out of context comments to feed his followers?

1664516967949.png

i wasn't sure, until today, when this was posted.

1664517514146.png

i'm convinced that he is trying to elicit a response from fuentes and the groypers. he snorts and squeals about the platforms from which he's been removed, while grunting his gratitude for cozytv, but he knows that his time there is limited. either the "suc gang" will fall for the thirst post, the catboi lover will voice his obvious repulsion, or the ragepig will simply claim that "christ is kang" and fuentes isn't a "real trad cath". either way, he's maneuvering.

(edited to credit @Fannyscum and @Jump for the pantsu posts, and to include the archive of ethan ralph's twitter for the past few weeks)

TypicalSemite said:
Nick is right
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opinion dismissed.
 
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incelistan said:
Surely AF would already know much of what's wrong with Ralph. Otherwise why would those freaks recruit him?
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I think they still believed he could be an asset before they realized that his audience was gone for ever, that his numbers are boosted by bots, hatewatchers and fakes on every platforms, while attracting the wrong kind of woke people with influence who can use Ralph's presence to hurt the cozy platform. Hosting the hunt was a terrible mistake and I hope they are starting to figure it out. Nobody will join their movement because of Ethan Ralph, and it has hurt their reputation in general.
Time to cut the losses.

By the way during the lockdown I created an account on tweeter to follow some cows, and I am pretty sure that gunty is writing some of the answers to his tweets. Likes are really suspects too.
 
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I see a lot of people listing out crazy shit Ralph has done, which is fair, but I think we're missing the heart of the issue.

I don't think this was always the case, but for the past few years Ralph has been a thin-skinned, hypocritical, dishonest faggot. Any criticism or joke at his expense is enough to turn friends to mortal enemies.
It's cringe. People don't like it. People don't respect it. Ralph brags about being this way. It has led him to cause many problems for himself and those around him, including the revenge porn stuff.
 
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Research Purposes Mostly said:
I see a lot of people listing out crazy shit Ralph has done, which is fair, but I think we're missing the heart of the issue.

I don't think this was always the case, but for the past few years Ralph has been a thin-skinned, hypocritical, dishonest faggot. Any criticism or joke at his expense is enough to turn friends to mortal enemies.
It's cringe. People don't like it. People don't respect it. Ralph brags about being this way. It has led him to cause many problems for himself and those around him, including the revenge porn stuff.
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The textbook example of his thin skinned, birch made makeup is his sperg out with Chrissie Mayr. He was so irrationally butthurt, it was astonishing and hilarious to watch. It also led to this classic clip:

 
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.iota. said:
i do believe that the drunken swine thinks he's being clever.

three days ago, he tweeted about joining rokfin "by their invitation". i sincerely doubt that he was invited to do anything more than submit a content creator application, like everyone else.

View attachment 3702249

then yesterday, he tweeted about not returning to odysee, in favor of rumble and rokfin. he included a backhoofed comment about being "stuck" on odysee, but i think that was directed more at null and rekieta, who have been streaming there because of youtube bullshit. his comment about cozytv is contrived solely to deliver criticism.

View attachment 3702253

he also takes this photo of his never-bride, her nipples, and her baby ... all the things that fuentes fears and reviles ... and then posts it from meigh's twitter in some kind of attempt to portray her as domesticated and docile. again, contrived as could be, but to what end. is he looking for more out of context comments to feed his followers?

View attachment 3702267

i wasn't sure, until today, when this was posted.

View attachment 3702303

i'm convinced that he is trying to elicit a response from fuentes and the groypers. he snorts and squeals about the platforms from which he's been removed, while grunting his gratitude for cozytv, but he knows that his time there is limited. either the "suc gang" will fall for the thirst post, the catboi lover will voice his obvious repulsion, or the ragepig will simply claim that "christ is kang" and fuentes isn't a "real trad cath". either way, he's maneuvering.

(edited to credit @Fannyscum and @Jump for the pantsu posts, and to include the archive of ethan ralph's twitter for the past few weeks)


opinion dismissed.
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>They're mad that I'm trad
>They're mad I'm a doormat

Couldn't have happened to a nicer person. If I see the usual faggots inviting Meigh on podcasts and try to get in good favor with her once she inevitably escapes Ralph's pig trough, I'm gonna call them gay on an unprecedented scale.
 
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Idk if anyone mentioned it, but Ralph did fly to Portugal with the stated intention of engaging in sexual contact with a minor (Warski's sister). Doing that kind of thing used to earn you a seat across from Chris Hansen, a ride to the local pokey and spot on the sex offender registry. Ralph, to my knowledge has avoided at least 2 of those.
 
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.iota. said:
i do believe that the drunken swine thinks he's being clever.

three days ago, he tweeted about joining rokfin "by their invitation". i sincerely doubt that he was invited to do anything more than submit a content creator application, like everyone else.

View attachment 3702249

then yesterday, he tweeted about not returning to odysee, in favor of rumble and rokfin. he included a backhoofed comment about being "stuck" on odysee, but i think that was directed more at null and rekieta, who have been streaming there because of youtube bullshit. his comment about cozytv is contrived solely to deliver criticism.

View attachment 3702253
Click to expand...
I can't believe his pfp looks like that. He looks like a "This person doesn't exist" manifestation.

See, this is what's great about Ralph.
His greatest/most amusing sin is being a mental human centipede. He eats, shits into his own mouth, shits into his own mouth again and then eats where he shits. The train of shit eating gets longer with every chance he fucks up, but his cock-eyed porcine brain cannot recognise it. Instead his maliciousness and hubris gets louder and louder with each failure.
He'll get kicked off Cozy and he'll issue the same kind of statement with absolute CWC levels of lack of situational awareness. The Ralphacycle will continue.
 
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I just love wherever Gunt and pony live it has corrugated metal, clothes pins and washer tub.

Ralph is going all the way to 1950’s West Memphis poor white trash standards, or at least May is. Ralph won’t have to try and keep his kid clean in a bug and cockroach infested shitpile.

I do think Ralph’s worst sin against a female might be cursing a daughter with his face. Poor Cozy TM Rozy.
 
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Near said:
>They're mad that I'm trad
>They're mad I'm a doormat

Couldn't have happened to a nicer person. If I see the usual faggots inviting Meigh on podcasts and try to get in good favor with her once she inevitably escapes Ralph's pig trough, I'm gonna call them gay on an unprecedented scale.
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I will never understand the mental gymnastics these people go through to convince other people that their happy. You are engaged to Ethan Ralph ( not married not trad), You have a had a child with him out of wedlock (not trad) you spend lots of time with your parents because Ethan Ralph can not support you and will poison your child with smoke (not trad).

I guess neigh is a sad beaten housewife which is kinda trad? but not something to brag about.
 
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