It goes even farther than that. Most of those "Veterans" are supposedly staunchly Pro-Capitalism, but they conveniently 'forgot' that the military they're so fond of telling stories about, is 100%
totalitarian socialsim. Nobody gets to 'vote' on leadership, or decide where they want to live, or what job they do. The military base is "commons" from one end to the other, with schools, theaters, gyms, parks & rec, and 'free' housing.
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Have never forgotten it at all. Pointed it out at times to colleagues.
Some clarifications. If you have a family and/or of at least a certain rank you do get to decide where you want to live, normally. Bases have only a limited amount of family housing available. Furthermore, that housing is divided up by rank and family size. Depending on the cost of living in the area, base housing will vary in attraction. The housing is "free" only in that you don't pay rent, electricity, gas, water. sewer, or trash. Instead, you don't get your housing allowance. Only lived in base housing once, at the last assignment. Very nice, historic house, for senior officers. The three of us lived in a three-bedroom, 1850 square-foot house on a street with just ten houses total. Base is on top of a hill. Had a great view of the bay. On the 4th of July no better place to watch the fireworks.
No, you don't necessarily decide what job you'll do. But the higher you go, the more the assignment process becomes a hiring process. Your boss is doing some scouting around for you. You stay in touch with people you know and the guy/gal at the personnel center. There can be a lot of behind-the-scenes maneuvering. And sometimes "they" say, "You are in this specialty, have X background and qualifications. Base Y needs just that. Off you go." That happens, too. Needs of the service come first. In that case, about all you and your boss can do is negotiate when you have to be at the new base.
And, again, if you are of high enough rank, when you get to the new base/job, you and your new boss usually sit down together and decide what you'll be doing. Every assignment has a written description of the duties to be performed. However, by the time you get there you may well end up doing some different duties, or some additional duties. Sometimes you are put into a one-deep job for which you have received no training whatsoever, and given only general guidance as to what you are needed to do. You figure it out. You find people in other specialties who can help. If lucky, you can contact your predecessor for some background/suggestions. You make your own job. These can be some of the very best jobs to have in the military, if you have a supportive command.
You are quite right that you don't get to formally vote on your leadership. But you don't do that in civilian jobs, either. Sometimes you have great leaders. Sometimes you have good leaders. Sometimes you have bad leaders. Usually you will see some mix of great/good/bad leaders, just like in a civilian job. The higher you go, the more likely you will be in a leadership position. Hopefully you have absorbed the lessons learned from people who led you in the past as to what to do or not do. You do your best and give it your best - mission first, people always. Least that's the way I did it when leading/commanding.
While you don't get to formally vote on your leadership, at times you can informally vote to get a toxic leader out. Have known of at least one case where a lieutenant had pissed off so many of the people working for him that the senior noncommissioned officers went to the unit's chief of operations, usually a major or lieutenant colonel, and told that officer the lieutenant needs to go before someone kills him. That lieutenant ended up as the commander's executive officer, even though the unit was short of officers in his specialty. This is not something that is done lightly. You really have to work to have such a thing happen to you. And sometimes nothing will happen because the officer in question is the commander's "golden boy/girl". But you also have the same sorts of things happen in civilian jobs.
Yes, we certainly have our base exchanges, commissaries, gyms, theaters, gas stations, child care centers, but they are open to all ranks and their families. Compared to militaries of "socialist" countries, US military facilities are incomparably better. US military members are much better paid and have a better quality of life. Even forty years ago, I never knew of any US officer, of any rank, that had to live with his family in one or two rooms in a run-down apartment building. Happened all the time with Soviet officers. Likely still happening now to a certain extent with Russian officers.