Off-Topic Losing people to transgenderism support thread - Support group for trans widows and other people who lost loved ones to troonism

[Agarathium1066]

To those who have lost friends and family to troonery, have you asked them this: Do you know anyone who has finished their transition and is now free of dysphoria and living a happy and fulfilled life? If the answer is no, then what does that say about transitioning?

All of the trannies I've met who've "transitioned socially" remain deeply fucked up and miserable due to their constant mistakes and stupid assumptions. The only one I've known that seemed mildly happier after surgical bullshit was already mired in health issues and prone to tumbling down into depression due to it anyway. So I assume it was just more of the same for them but now partially self-inflicted.

 

[Marvin]

A few moments after he said that, he proceeded to film me so I don't think it was in a nonsexual context. The fucker was also an anime addict and there were a few moments where he would reference loli so I know that he was probably turned on by the idea of "cute, vulnerable girls who don't know any better". The typical shit that's in porn.

Oh no, I think I didn't explain myself very well.

Your behavior was what was in the non-sexual context.

He saw it and was like "wow, that's very non-sexual... now how can I beat off to it?"

To those who have lost friends and family to troonery, have you asked them this: Do you know anyone who has finished their transition and is now free of dysphoria and living a happy and fulfilled life? If the answer is no, then what does that say about transitioning?

I mean, they probably exist, but the real problem is in the unpredictability.

It's like how they used to say that red wine was good for one's heart, based on some shaky study. Now they don't say that anymore because they've kind of all accepted that the margins for that claim were razor thin to begin with.

But even when they did say that, no doctors were out there writing prescriptions for boxes of wine, because while even if there were individuals whose heart health was massively helped by red wine, it wasn't predictable enough for a doctor to make any hard statements.

That's the thing, some trannies actually are probably content being awkward, vaguely "female" looking eunuchs. They probably chilled out a lot after the castration and are just quietly living their lives. Good for them.

But the current state of the science cannot make reasonable predictions about which candidates would fit that profile any better than just flipping a fucking coin. (If this is something we should even be filing under "medicine" compared to just "circus act body modification".)

 

[monstrous bubo]

This friend went from the sweetest, peppiest, happiest person I knew, to someone depressed and sullen and agoraphobic since talking to these people.

This is just so awful

Have you told her this? She’ll be defensive if you talk poonerism, but maybe not if you talk about her sadness and isolation. Sorry if you’ve already tried this.

 

[Ouro Boros]

I lost a friend to trannyhood a while back. They were aight at the time, but over time, my distaste for these sad (and occasionally dangerous) dudes had grown and when I gave them my opinions on "insert tranny-coded fictional character here" they were distasteful. I split up with them when they announced they were distancing themselves from me after....get this, disagreeing with them on opinions claiming they're "dismissing" them! What a fucking tard.....literally, they were autistic.

 

[Jacques1194]

Ironically enough, and perhaps this is some form of horseshoe theory, but I personally don't encounter much troon bullshit where I live, in Baltimore.

Its the same here in New York.I live in a liberal, black dominate town and i've only seen maybe one troon throughout my entire life.Even where my sister and other family members live(which is whiter), there are no troons.The schools that are near me, i probably only saw maybe one guy that possibly was a troon.Unless the troons are all good at passing, its crazy to me how active this ideology is online.Literally in this one fandom i'm in, i cant think of one teenage fan that wasn't some gender or lgbtq special.Half the time i wonder if these people are just claiming to be trans online just for attention but aren't irl.

 

[Marvin]

Unless the troons are all good at passing, its crazy to me how active this ideology is online.Literally in this one fandom i'm in, i cant think of one teenage fan that wasn't some gender or lgbtq special.Half the time i wonder if these people are just claiming to be trans online just for attention but aren't irl.

There's definitely a decent chunk of weirdos who've just slapped on a wig and a skirt a few times and sauntered around the bedroom, but 99% of the rest of the time, are just an anime profile online.

But when they do venture out into the real world, I think it's mostly a suburban thing.

Like just as a small sample, last year Tony Reed and some troons attended a troon round table with some obscure Maryland governor longshot candidate.

Most of those troons were from suburban parts of the state, or the eastern shore, which is mostly rural small towns. (but comfy small towns, probably too polite to shittalk the freaky crossdressers) The main exemptions are just the black pooners. Which btw, black transmen have their own unique weird trends, not sure what I think of them.

 

[Beige]

To those who have lost friends and family to troonery, have you asked them this: Do you know anyone who has finished their transition and is now free of dysphoria and living a happy and fulfilled life? If the answer is no, then what does that say about transitioning?

All the ones I've met are extremely paranoid, self-conscious, and generally miserable with occasional bouts of spastic, manic "happiness" (usually as a result of sex and/or drugs).

There's a really pervasive pattern of denial that I've noticed: Being a total shut-in that only socializes within their own trans-heavy subcultures, while acting like they do that because they'll literally be assaulted and murdered anywhere outside of that. This is coming from people that live in a very liberal and LGBT friendly place.

It's like deep down they know what they're doing is super fucking gross and weird so they feel bad. So, the solution is to continually gaslight themselves that the fear/shame they deal with is a product of societal transphobia and being in legitimate physical danger, and so they form social circles around reinforcing this delusion.

Literal self-inflicted mass hysteria.

 

[countrybumpkin]

Its the same here in New York.I live in a liberal, black dominate town and i've only seen maybe one troon throughout my entire life.Even where my sister and other family members live(which is whiter), there are no troons.The schools that are near me, i probably only saw maybe one guy that possibly was a troon.Unless the troons are all good at passing, its crazy to me how active this ideology is online.Literally in this one fandom i'm in, i cant think of one teenage fan that wasn't some gender or lgbtq special.Half the time i wonder if these people are just claiming to be trans online just for attention but aren't irl.

I know one that pretends to be an actual woman online and does his trooning in the privacy of his home.

 

[AfghanBlue]

I somewhat disagree with that. While I'd like to be considered based, some of the younger folk (and those around my age) get the newfound attention going to their heads and they become more insufferable, at least until their fellow performers set them straight.

I think that's the thing those who get any amount of attention, adulation, experienced withing the real world have to navigate and negotiate that alongside other people. Not just sitting alone in their room, soaking it all in, as a single entity.

They compromise and negotiate and engage with other people's egos, and learn to grow socially.

This difference, and the fact that autists, who troons are more likely to be, also have an innate narcissistic tendancey anyway: more like a kind of neutral one, only person in the world in the way that they don't relate to others rather than just not caring either way.
So it's already shaky ground to then throw some one-way traffic of social feel good points onto.

Seen also in their weird compulsion to become the object of their desires. It's not normal for straight guys and girls which is what the vast majority of modern troons are, to try to become the thing they want to fuck.
But they just seem totally uninterested in anything outside themselves, so they just steam on ahead with their autosexuality.
I suppose that will happen when you spend your sexual awakening and entire realm of experience = wanking to endless, free, hardcore porn from childhood. So their sexuality develops as a solo venture naturally.

 

[One Quick Post]

I don't usually like PLing on Kiwi Farms for obvious reasons, but I guess I just have to spill my thoughts somewhere that'll understand. Called my mother today and she told me that apparently my niece believes she is a he now. She's only 13, for fucks sake.

I never posted an update to this, but it's been over a year and pretty much nothing has happened. She's not interested in taking meds or getting the surgeries or anything, it seems to purely be a fad thing, thank God. The biggest change is she has the dumbest haircut I have ever seen, but hey, teens are just like that. She told us she got the idea "from talking to people online" and her parents are keeping an eye on that. If it were my child I'd fucking delete Discord from her iPad (and she also wouldn't have an iPad) but her parents don't get the big deal with her "talking to her online friends."

I'm the only one in the family that doesn't play along with her shit, I'm not hostile about it but I "deadname" her to her face and I call her a she. She's never combative about it, because she isn't a rowdy teenage boy, she's a confused young woman going through rough times. She very obviously has developed body image issues and seems to be very self conscious about what she eats. All in all, I think she's just being a teenager, and as long as she gets steered clear of medical procedures she'll grow up to be a normal woman and remember this as a very cringe period of her life, like we all do with our teen years.

Just thought it'd be nice to drop a positive update for once. This thread doesn't get too many of those.

 

[Lavender Moth]

This is just so awful

Have you told her this? She’ll be defensive if you talk poonerism, but maybe not if you talk about her sadness and isolation. Sorry if you’ve already tried this.

I have. She does seem to be somewhat aware of the fact that her loony poon friends and lack of irl hobbies are key factors in her mental state (choice quotes: "Moth, I love hanging with you because you're the only friend I have who won't be mean if I say something wrong" And "sometimes I get tired of my other friends. They spend so much time 'calling out' others online, it scares me.")

However, I'm not optimistic, as I had another very similar and once beloved friend who went down the same trajectory of almost getting it, but she still jumped on the nonbinary TRA train despite the fact, most likely because her then girlfriend (now wife, but demands being called her "husband") went full balls to the wall pooner back in 2014. The other friends in that group all followed suit except me. One friend from that group is dead because her "cool queer party pals" normalized needle use around her and got her addicted to opioids. She shot up with something laced and it killed her. The wife of the other friend I mentioned is currently dying of colon cancer directly related to her testosterone use at the ripe old age of...30.

 

[Ethereal Eye]

All the ones I've met are extremely paranoid, self-conscious, and generally miserable with occasional bouts of spastic, manic "happiness" (usually as a result of sex and/or drugs).

There's a really pervasive pattern of denial that I've noticed: Being a total shut-in that only socializes within their own trans-heavy subcultures, while acting like they do that because they'll literally be assaulted and murdered anywhere outside of that. This is coming from people that live in a very liberal and LGBT friendly place.

It's like deep down they know what they're doing is super fucking gross and weird so they feel bad. So, the solution is to continually gaslight themselves that the fear/shame they deal with is a product of societal transphobia and being in legitimate physical danger, and so they form social circles around reinforcing this delusion.

Literal self-inflicted mass hysteria.

I wonder if feeling the need to slap LGBT stickers all over their personal belongings/car, and feeling the need to randomly bring up LGBT related hotbutton topics at random times is part of that. They can't resist talking about themselves in some indirect way either. Funny you mention the whole "assaulted and murdered" thing. The few that I have known have that victim complex. They truly think that someone is just going to up and randomly kill them in the street cus "they are being themselves". In fact, its more likely to be the other way around, with them instigating a murder or assault.

 

[Wallace]

Funny you mention the whole "assaulted and murdered" thing. The few that I have known have that victim complex. They truly think that someone is just going to up and randomly kill them in the street cus "they are being themselves". In fact, its more likely to be the other way around, with them instigating a murder or assault.

Check out phobia indoctrination. It's another method by which cults isolate and control their members.

 

[Procrastinhater]

Same way DV victims can live with their abusers.
They change their words. They curb their behavior. They learn to watch carefully for any signals the abuser is giving that mean anger is building. They relinquish their family and friends to appease the abuser. They allow themselves to be isolated and reliant on the abuser. And most of all, they crave the love of the abuser. Above all things, they seek the brief moment of peace that comes with receiving approval.

That's fucking horrific, worst thing is you're right, it's pretty much the same for the person in that situation. It's so messed up.
I can't imagine being in that situation, if all your friends start to drink the Kool Aid, it must be an awkward postion between keeping quiet and going along to get along and not being able to resist calling out utter farce when you see it.
I guess it makes it even harder if you live in a woke area or line of work and you livlihood could be negatively affected by speaking up against this deranged shit.

The most functional black Americans, genuinely good people, are either super fucking lucky, or grew up in the south, or served in the military for a bit.

There's a lot of Black folk in the South and most of the ones I know are pretty decent hard working respectable guys, they also have very little patience for faggotry or troon shit, I don't know if it's a Black thing in general, but its not just Urban Black's that openly shit on them from what I've seen.

cwc doesn't have the same fear signals as normal people. He just drove up and shacked up in the ghetto with no problem that weekend. I guess a bunch of black dudes didn't want to fuck with the obviously insane cracker in their neighborhood.

They likely saw him as an oddity and not worth bothering with. Ghetto type niggers from what I've seen are also extremely wary around obviously mentally ill folk and tend to give them a wide berth, almost if they think its contagious.

I can only imagine what a bunch of hood niggas from Baltimore thought seeing Chris checking into an Air B&B for a weekend. From the weird dress sense to the algae hair, he screams "crazy person" they likely had a good laugh - from a safe distance.

 

[Big Forehead Turbo Manlet]

When I was younger, say almost a decade ago, I was very progressive. I was a good LGBT ally, always thought that they had a hard time in life and were treated unfairly. That was up until I actually met a few. Let me tell ya, the best way to convince someone that these people aren't normal is to meet them. I was fighting for people I hadn't've even met yet just because it was the right thing to do and that I was cool and punk for it.

Spoiler: Anyway here's my story

I've lost a few of my close friends around 2016ish. They were nerdy kids like me, just finishing up high school. One of them (nicknamed C) just broke up with his girlfriend of two years and almost OD'd on benzos, he was out for a week at the hospital. First few days were to monitor his health, the next few to make sure he could leave and he wouldn't try it again. The friend group felt really bad for him and we stuck with him through it. At his 18th or 19th birthday party, he pulls me aside and talks about how he feels like he was born in the wrong body. I tell him I supported him and and he told me his new name and as soon as the words left his mouth, I got a sour taste in my mouth and a pit in my stomach. I know something had just changed but I wasn't sure what though. To call him anything other than his name felt strange. It felt wrong. We came out to everyone else a white after and we all supported him. Shortly after this, everyone was getting ready to go to uni and move out. Most of my friends moved to a different town while only a few stayed behind and pursued employment for the time being. We all still kept in touch through Skype and Discord.

A few months pass and the next friend of mine (nicknamed W) who went to uni comes out. I also come to find out he's a furry which I didn't really care for but still supported him. He chose a really stupid name for himself that he insisted on being pronounced a certain way. I was still feeling weird from C transitioning and this made me feel worse. I was coping that I was still a good ally and that there must've been a problem with me. I was thinking "whatever, if I really have a problem with the name I'll just refer to him by his last name. Time passes and he changes his full legal name to some hyphenated weeb word salad. As if having a stupidly complex name wasn't bad enough, he chose his last name to be the same as his favourite video game character's. I think immediately "that's a really fucking stupid decision, that's going to fuck you later in life" but I bite my tongue, smiling and nodding. I looked up his twitter after and it was pretty standard nerdy stuff like 40K and MTG but I noticed that he was following a lot of people who also legally changed their last name to same the last name as that same video game character's. Sirens went off instantly, this dude is in a weird cult. I wasn't thinking "troon cult" yet, I was still a good ally.

They all go out to a party with a few people we used to know from high school and a few people they met at uni. All is going well but then I hear a week later from an old friend. He wanted to talk about the party and about one of our friends (nicknamed J). He said that J was constantly handing him drinks and hanging around him. J would try to split my friend away from everyone else and would try to get him into a room so they'd be alone. He would make weird remarks like "have you ever felt the touch of a woman?" and "have you ever had sex? I could teach you." He's ends up getting way too drunk and passes out on the stairs. I bring this up to the friend group and everyone's just kind of like "oh no, anyway." In just a few days, everyone's forgotten about it and he's hanging out with everyone again. I'm still biting my tongue because at this point I'm the odd one out so against my better judgement I think it's just something wrong with me, like I'm not getting something. J then comes out as trans and starts a twitter where he posts photos of himself going "aren't I cute? :3" and shit like that, despite being a 6ft behemoth. It was at this point the switch in my head finally flipped in my head. I knew something was wrong. I trawled their social medias and found they all had NSFW twitter accounts. They were all porn addicts. They were all into weird shit like sissy hypno and diapers. They would also frequently post about letting children transition. I then come to find out C married a man from America. Apparently they've known each other since C was 16. The dude he married is 5 years older than him, making him an adult when they first met. I can only assume he groomed C and that's why he's all fucked up. Hell, maybe C corrupted everyone else after being groomed, who knows.

After learning all of this I was feeling devastated. Those people I knew since high school were dead, and they had been replaced with these freaks. People that I felt close to, people that I could open up to. I thought I knew these people inside and out, but I was sorely mistaken. I've made new friends since then and thankfully they all share the same sentiment that I do now. I'm glad that they're out of my life but a part of me misses the people they once were. Looking back,the signs were clear and I should've trusted my gut. They all had single mothers that didn't care about them and would frequently take vacations without them, they all had no real father figure and they all had unfettered access to the Internet at an early age.

I'm very shit at writing so sorry if it doesn't read well. I'm totally fine with everything now and I've been helping others that have had similar experiences cope with it. Just wanted to post this somewhere as I've been thinking about it recently.

 

[Procrastinhater]

Reading the stories on this thread makes me think of the guy on this video

It really is like once the Cult gets hold of people they're like PodPeople.
Its fucking freakish and horrifying, especially with how it seems to spread among friend groups, one person troons and before you know it others start to troon out until the poster is left wondering what the fuck happened.
Its not a social contagion though, huh?

 

[7-7-7]

I had a friend who lived nearby, we would sometimes go shopping or just hang out. When I first met her, she had a boyfriend who lived far away, then suddenly she had two boyfriends. I didn’t speak to her for a year, then got a message on telegram from a contact, but didn’t recognize the name attached to the number. Asked her and she told me that it was part of her transition. Didn’t really get what she meant, then she sent a long voice memo telling me about her pronouns, her journey etc.
Texted with her a little bit more, but then stopped. It just made me very sad.

 

[Joe Lieberman]

There's definitely a decent chunk of weirdos who've just slapped on a wig and a skirt a few times and sauntered around the bedroom, but 99% of the rest of the time, are just an anime profile online.

But when they do venture out into the real world, I think it's mostly a suburban thing.

Like just as a small sample, last year Tony Reed and some troons attended a troon round table with some obscure Maryland governor longshot candidate.

Most of those troons were from suburban parts of the state, or the eastern shore, which is mostly rural small towns. (but comfy small towns, probably too polite to shittalk the freaky crossdressers) The main exemptions are just the black pooners. Which btw, black transmen have their own unique weird trends, not sure what I think of them.

Anecdotally I'd disagree about the "mostly a suburban thing" aspect. I live in one of the biggest cities in the US, and frequently visit some of the other biggest cities in the country as well as smaller cities that are regional hubs. Trans shit is definitely common in NY/LA/Chicago/the SF Bay, but I'd go so far as to say it's a lot more prevalent and a dominant subculture in places like Minneapolis, Portland or Seattle, because when you see more "alternative" people they're more likely to be in your face about being genderspecial.

To those who have lost friends and family to troonery, have you asked them this: Do you know anyone who has finished their transition and is now free of dysphoria and living a happy and fulfilled life? If the answer is no, then what does that say about transitioning?

The first trans person I ever met, in college in the mid/late 00's, probably meets these criteria. I was in classes with a butch-dressing woman who took a semester off and came back with a male name, dressed like a man, etc. I was not close with this person at all, but as far as I know it wasn't an issue with anyone and nobody really brought it up, everyone used the new name and pronouns without missing a beat. I think he's a lawyer and married to a woman now, and has a quiet and low key life and rarely, if ever, posts on social media. I honestly don't think the way he lives his life is any of my business.

 

[Jacques1194]

Ok so i have an update on this one online TIF i know, and starting to connect the dots.She admitted to me she was a victim of grooming when she was younger, and now it turns out she once again was groomed online by someone that the two of us knew online that turned out to be pedophile.Like i feel bad for this girl.She's autistic and has been groomed twice, its no wonder she's fucking trooning out of womanhood.I sadly feel like there's nothing i can do and just hope that she realizes that transitioning wont bring peace to herself.

 

[fenny]

And I'm blocked. I told "Khai" I was kind of concerned about her sudden, fervent desire for top surgery when she's never expressed any discomfort with her breasts other than "big boobs are inconvenient when I work out" and wanting to start testosterone especially when she has current, poorly dealt with hormonal issues, and got paragraphs of how disappointing I am as a friend. Because I actually give a shit. Fuck this.