random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Onni Kalsarikännit]

"I became trans after watching hundreds of hours of sissy hypno so I know brainwashing is real."

 

[Haffhart]

'hey guys I know we were just under siege but there's a giant ass wooden horse at the gate and it looks wicked cool.'
'well don't leave it outside faggot. bring it in'

 

[Blackhole]

he is electric hedgehog pokemon
he is fast and has lightning
he fights for allah

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

TL; DR - men jacking off to porn instead of forming families is good because they're spending more time contributing to GDP.

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

Nino's Cunny is really good.

 

[Big Al's Famous Pork]

We know it occurred on or about November 3rd, 2019 in Zurich. Database searches of “dog hair,” “rape,” “BDSM,” “play,” and the name LFJ was going by publicly & professionally at that time

 

[Blatant hypocrite]

I am not actually against mixed race marriages. I really just don't want to take a suggestion from @Trombonista as she was after all the first kiwi to want to see the Wogglebug grow 50 feet tall and breath fire.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

You didn't suck dick because you wanted to play Cyberpunk 2077. You sucked dick because you're a whore.

This potato's potato-gf is actually kinda cute

it’s like a child gangrape.

Teachers need to start paying kids to kick the shit out of the misbehaviors. Kids already think school is prison so why not just go all the way?

I seriously doubt this plebbitor has even read Schopenhauer much less understood him.

I really fucking hate how everything has to devolve in to some shitty chain of stupid, unfunny comments.

That kid's going to join the Army at 17, commit a war crime by 18, and come home to kill whores outside of Fort Benning.

This seems like an appropriate time to let you all know I never actually liked Josh I just sucked up to him for power and influence.

Not to mention they think we have porn here. I mean, we do. But you don't want it.

god i hope i articulate my point in a way that isn't retarded or autistic

Some of you didn't spend your childhood making online friends you eventually realized were all old unemployed autistic furry trannies and it shows.

Please explain. I'm not a woman, but so far in my years of not having sex with a woman I have yet to have a child.

In which fold resides the anus?

You want some real fun? Message posters from r/gangstalking with random alpha-numeric codes. It really brings the schizo out.

I've been looking in to this Karl Marx guy that these stupidpol people seem to like so much, a whole lot of talk about "workers" and the "poor", but where is the concern for the Adult Baby Diaper Furry Lovers??? It's 2021, do better!

Good morning I hate redditors

Instead of "woke" I'll use a more accurate term, jewish.

Two redditors found out they lived on the same street and were openly discussing which number their house is in the comments. Their post history had the city, so the only thing I had to do was find out the name of the street, which isn’t that difficult if you know how to use google maps (street view).
I sent them both goatse greeting cards.

Normies are just so careless.

God I wish there was a suicide button on instagram. Sending barely legal Latvian camwhores to eternal rest would be pretty kino.

Fedora tippers will smugly state that believing in an imaginary sky friend is lunacy whilst telling you that the 6'6" man with a full beard is a woman and because his mental illness says so.

 

[Sprate Header]

The Police came & knocked my door (murder attempt)

 

[IamnottheNSA]

Maybe she realized he fucked her dog before he fucked her.

 

[Blackhole]

Just to let you know, John, that Gamergate 2 will have 16 times the detail of the first one. Bet you can't wait.

You can't shit yourself if you don't wear pants, stalker child.

 

[IAmNotAlpharius]

How long can it last? Longer than Buzzfeed will, Ellie.

Currently, the mood on Kiwi Farms is defiant and gleeful. “We’re back,” wrote one user on Sept. 27. “Cope and seethe.”

Random.txt worthy

 

[Dr. Butt]

He does realize he was packed with soy before it was even cool, doesn't he? Can he not remember his own fucking burrito?

 

[ロボ﹏§¤r﹏h¶rœ]

It was the thermonuclear pozzloading of the Internet's neghole.

 

[3MMA]

This single realization -- that journalists are malicious scumbags who lie more often than politicians and can absolutely never be trusted to relay any truthful information (even by accident) -- is the single most important step towards a much more pragmatic, useful and productive world view.

 

[Koby_Fish]

"[Gender dysphoria] is like being considered attractive after being in a horrific disfiguring car crash."

 

[JustSomeDong]

There's something unbelievably satisfying about seeing cold, inarguable reality slap the coddled or the delusional right in the face.

 

[Johnny Eastwood cash]

seethe more hoopers, doomers win yet again

I am right, and no one can convince me I’m wrong.

Meat is for degenerate barbarians, soybug paste is the food of the future.

are you kissing your mother with this mouth?

Small penis and no zoomer bitches on yo dick

Weightlifting as a concept is such a product of faggotry it's truly incredible.

 

[Meat Target]

stop worrying so much about your cholesterol and worry more about burning your face off in a fire.

 

[Where's Waldo?]

Pee Cola said:
I could take a steaming dump onto my laptop, smear it into the keyboard so deeply that half the keys gum up and stop working, yet that still wouldn't be the shittiest thing I'd be seeing on my laptop rn.