random_text.txt

[I'm Retarded?]

A careful reading of this text and diligent consideration on my part has revealed to me that there are in fact (as stated in rule 30) no girls on the internet, although whether the term 'girl' here is encompassing of 'women' I cannot say since I do not have the prerequisite degrees in biology, and women's studies to even begin to fathom what a woman is or is not.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

I like her because she has a job. The whole thing about being poor around wealthy people, and even being friends with people with more money than you, was really relatable. It's a shame they market her primarily as the "black princess" instead of the "Working class princess".

Experience the magic™ of sending your loved ones to the afterlife, the Disney™ way! Only $100 per jar of ashes. $200 extra to have mickey pour the ashes.

My little cousin likes bananas.
She has a whole literal song and dance when presented with a banana because she really likes to eat them.
It is the cutest thing I have ever seen.

"Uh-oh, hope I don't get any of pappy's ashes in my dole whip!"

There's also the HBO-ificiation of most live-action shit. Everything has to be dark and gritty and ugly.
"It's realistic" they say, shitting out another season of Euphoria.
"It's mature and adult!" they cry, watching another rape scene.
"This is what real life is like!" they proclaim from their couches as another character is graphically disembowled.

slight OT but I wonder how many fans of Orange Bird are aware of who Anita Bryant is. Especially the very gay ones.

Yeah. For those that don't know, a lot of people in the Frozen fandom ship Elsa and Anna

Jesus christ. Despite being told by several people several times to stop sperging embarrassing shit about yourself, you keep on going.

I can't wait for your thread.

It's plausible deniability for when you really want to get railed by a leather daddy but in a family friendly way.

Thanks king of the bitchniggers.

Anyone remember her: Jaquie? Husband was a cop? On all sorts of drugs as well. 8/10 would probably bang if she gained 20lb and didn’t dress like a little girl. Had quite the following on YouTube.

straight adult men don't usually enjoy musicals. Nothing screams fag more than a dude singing Disney songs.

Is it bad that because of his wording I can't tell if this means he's purchased some sort of antique combat knife, or he's inserted it into someone's asshole?

The criteria for gaining a Pink Triangle must be awfully strict.

I was hoping for some good news about 3-headed rottweilers I could unleash upon nigger porch pirates.

sadly we do not have a thread for people getting tortured with weed whackers

He's probably hiding in a bush watching his dead girlfriend make out with another chick.

He sounds like he had a gay stroke

He's a terrible model for Betsey Johnson because her clothes are all about big personality and being cheerful. And yes, some of her runways had fags, but they have sparkle.

It started with him sperging about old computers, but the topic gradually shifted toward his pedophilic and zoosadist fantasies.

i truly don't understand tiktok. why would you record this and post it. what does it accomplish, how is this entertaining for people to watch.

I miss the old Blanchard, the jizzing-on-walls Blanchard

Yep and they used single-point harnesses which they had little control and spun around which makes the idea of them shooting FG-42s in the air metal as fuck. Just imagine hundreds of Nazi paratroopers spinning around spraying everything below them with 8mm.

Well i guess you could call it trolling but i just dont see the point at all.

If I was an alien race I would use it a case study to avoid humans at all costs.

 

[Aunt Carol]

Man some people won't even throw out chicken bones or parmesan rinds because you can still use them to make soup. Meanwhile this nigga just threw out a whole dick he was still using to have sex.

 

[Archie_Kimkicker]

Can we get back to Chinese industrial accidents and electrocutions in Shitdickistan?

Fuck this drama you niggers have going on

 

[Table Country]

It's only considered real a-log if it's from the Kiwifarms region

Why I have an eerie feeling then she might have some hidden skeletons in her closet?

Easy to believe when her own skeleton has been hidden under rolls of gunt fat and pancake makeup for years.

I think the moral of the story is that we need gender equality in serial murder and rape.

Get to it, women.

 

[MS Paint Gigachad]

From my experience with naked aging fat men, he does not have enough free penis accessible to pull through the slit in a pair of briefs and then a trouser fly, much less over the top of sweat pants.

 

[Zero Day Defense]

And the name of the husband: Coomer McBoomer.

 

[Aero the Alcoholic Bat]

monkey slave labor sounds based as fuck tbh

 

[Larry David's Opera Cape]

Once again the power of the almighty word nigger cleaves someone's life in twain.

 

[Mannibal]

More like "Sadness and Stinkditches"

It's dangerous alright... dangerously based

They're, like, fighting the system man. They ain't giving money to THE MAN. Love is love, man.

Have an alpaca blanket.

The topsoil identifies as healthy.

cockroach sophisticate.

This premier of the pig porn slug edition is just a cash grab.

Noah is fat and I would sell cocaine to him (to make him less fat).

1. How dare you
2. Take that back

Is this the hamster in the fucking air fryer?

Damn she's already planning to eat the poor nigga

I despair at humanity that anyone ever had sex with her.

He went from being a romance scammer to a hostage.

(One of the quotes may be wrong, but I don’t know how to fix it)

 

[Faceless Whore]

If Wokeness was Cigarettes, the warning label would read:
'Wokeness causes Bank Failures, Paedophilia, Nigger Ass Rape and Suicide Bombings'

 

[TV's Adam West]

It's official lore now, Phil's depression made him masturbate in the room with the web cam in, and it was on the whole time huh

 

[Spud]

I have broken this dude's mind by not liking Linux or anime and I didn't even realize I was doing it.

 

[Faceless Whore]

View attachment 4783126

He is also an active member of a site called Kiwi Farms. They have caused the suicides of at least 4 people. They have a section on their site dedicated to causing my demise

 

[Spud]

Rape is appealing because we live in a society

 

[Onni Kalsarikännit]

Nick and his followers are dangerous to the establishment even if you think they're goofy retards.

 

[Meat Target]

Ya got to love Patrick. You could have a magical machine that clones a dozen of him, give them all separate Twitter accounts, and they would start attacking each other on social media.

 

[Pissmaster]

This is worse than posting tubgirl. Fuck you. Now that's all I can think about.

 

[JustSomeDong]

If you're confident enough to put pink on your flag, that says a lot about your balls.

So sayeth Null, todays MATI about 9 minutes in.

 

[Zero Day Defense]

It's not like you can go buy fent at CVS.