random_text.txt

[Gentlebastard]

If a Walmart floor employee expected me to call them sir or madam while I was shopping, I would have them taken out to the car park to be summarily executed.

Getting ideas above their station is not seemly.

This is nothing to do with gender, this is them knowing their place in the pecking order of life!

Patrick is an author in the same way that me writing the word “nigger” over and over again on Kiwi Farms makes me an author.

your "WIP" appears to be getting in Xitter arguments with your fucking toilet

Getting Skynetted sounds like salvation at this point.

Daily reminder


Fuck Henry Kissinger

Honestly, I'm just looking forward to arguments about which Linux distro to install on your sexbot, and the equivalent for AGI models.

I mean it’s not beheading children and abducting innocent civilians but this sort of thing is pretty annoying too.

A Christian Group Is Promoting An Alternative To Halloween — 'JesusWeen' Where People Wear White & Pass Out Bibles

Look, I like Jesus but this is a gay idea.
I’m going to dress as some superhero to show off the gainz and make fun of fat witches and you can’t stop me.

Edit: HE FUCKING PULLED A KITKAT FROM HIS FAT FOLDS, YOU GUYS. YOU G U Y S

I love how the Internet thinks we're Nazis, Communists, terrorists, murderers, and every bad thing, and we're really just Statler and Waldorf jeering from the balcony.

You know, after all is said and done I like that pooners adopt rats. They are intelligent, curious creatures (the rats). The chaos potatoes deserve to smell strange things like a hormone addled alphabet person.

Friendly reminder for all trans women to remember to visit their doctor for a prostate check!

"Tenacious Unicorn Ranch Documentary"

TURD.

haha.

it's close-minded to not want someone else's dick in your wife

Would the poor sod find himself blamed for all of the misery inflicted upon Patrick over the years, or would he become the first stalker in history who files for a restraining order to protect him from his victim?

I wasn't based enough to get doxed by the hate van

I love the doxmobile so much. Thank you based clown world.

I googled the author and have deemed her worthy of mating with me.

Has anything profound ever come from someone who describes themselves using a PornHub search term?

Your niggerness is impressive.

I appreciate a 'Midwest Polite' evisceration whenever I see it.

O.K. The orangatexts actually got a real life laugh out of me. Thats right up there with wookietexting and the lizard king.

It's absolutely insane, no normal person would act like this.

Then again, no normal person has a Kiwi Farms thread.

Question for the gentleman, is hopping on Facebook with Dad to ask for new ways to tuck your balls into your body normal father son bonding?

There's a disturbing amount of TIFs out there who want to be misgendered and force-bred. They're like the female equivalent of that one troon who wants to force women into breeding camps.

 

[Norman B. Normal]

"it's a little late to do anything for this particular cow"

 

[Kalsarikännit]

Courtesy of general chat.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

if I can weaponize my autism to improve my chances of getting shit done, the better.

Who is your barber? Is he a drunk?

 

[Illuminati Order Official]

Gayer than a rainbow covered dildo being rammed up Elton John's asshole by Freddie Mercurie's lubed sparkly mushroom kingdom toadstool cock

 

[zyclonPD]

Courtesy of me I guess.
@zyclonPD 11:32:21 PM
I don't normally condone mass shootings but in this case I'll make an exception

 

[Skitarii]

Frieza is going to blow up Kiwi Farms

 

[Return of the Freaker]

His profile pic will always be a gem, and you will never win Wrestlemania

Wow Useful, and I thought we had a thing. And now I find out you hate me? Did you ever love me at all? Was it all a lie?

The steamy nights; the spooning sessions... god I even let you have my last fries. And you hate me. God damn.

It would make more sense to store some cum in the bank for a rainy day, though, to avoid being tempted to do something like this.

 

[Gentlebastard]

Science fiction writers don't need knowledge of 5th grade math, child.

Every day the coombrained depths of reddit (hell) surprise and disgust me anew. There really is a fetish for everything.

i miss when satanist meant you worshipped satan not just hated Christianity

You can't worship Satan and be this much of a bitch.

kek even Satan doesn't want troons in his own stead, they're that disgusting

This is so gay that it's gayer than actual gay porn.

That's what you get for worshipping someone who got beat by a kid with a banjo

Harry potter was a mistake. The Christians were right.

I remember seeing a redditor claim that Australia wasn't totalitarian and his proof was they have mandatory voting. Australians are a lost cause

Eternal Ma'amnation

You have sinned, my child, say four transwomenarewomens and suck five girlcocks for penance

This is the most racist shitpost I've ever seen, and it was completely serious. My God.

Fuck it, let's go, all in. It's only going to get worse anyways.

He's fat by the 'we all have fucking eyes' standard

I can't believe I have to live this cursed timeline, just utterly vile.

Im sure he once said the sky was blue, but it was probably raining that day.

I can't wait to see what the top minds in places like Afghanistan or Somalia do with that money.

I honest to God laugh out loud every time I look at this thread. Okay I'm a retard so it's easy to make me laugh, but still. It brightens my day.

I had really high hopes for this documentary and all I got was yet another puff piece that covers everything we already knew about the ranch. Serves me right for thinking a troon's work was gonna be good.

This is totally like the time I accidentally roofied, hogtied, gagged and relentlessly buttfucked my brother in law! We still laugh about that little mix-up. And by laugh I mean he cowers, weeping, in a corner of his basement cage. The FBI are still looking for him! Lol, good times.

'At the end of the day, our goal is to celebrate whatever you and your dog are into'.

Wow I don't think I've read something this skeevy from a company in a long time.

They are some seriously weird motherfuckers over there

God fucking damnit. I should have known that was someone's fetish.

(un?)surprisingly there is a subreddit called "r/sexoffendersupport"

His takes are either deranged, NPR on HRT, or misinformed and smug.

They really are shit bag family incarnate, the animal abuse is icing on the white trash cake.

this fryer gives me strong Chris-Chan Keurig machine in the bathroom emanations.

If someone calls me a gay looking faggot I would probably laugh and talk shit about his mom, you know, like any normal human being would.

if you're desperate to pretend to be important around people go to starbucks like every other faggot

I can't believe my female socalization has made me stronger than this manchild chimping out over dad still loving him but making it clear he doesn't like the new thing his son is doing.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

I do, in fact, dig giant robots.

you subhuman scumfucks

My butthurt on this specific topic is immeasurable.

"Tenacious Unicorn Ranch Documentary"

TURD.

haha.

Alpacaschwitz is the name of the tranny-run Camelid Death Camp.

 

[Poonocchio]

If I were Israel I'd get one of those drone swarms that displays images in the sky and use it to paint the biggest picture of the Pedo Muhammed in the sky.

 

[Mr Bunny]

You have sinned, my child, say four transwomenarewomens and suck five girlcocks for penance

 

[Skitarii]

What kind of fucked up father would I have to be to raise both a wigger and a faggot?

 

[Poonocchio]

With memorable quotes such as:
'Whoooooooooooooo!'
'I will tear that pussy up! *grunts*'
'Whooooo! Whoooooooooo!'
' I will shove my cock so far up your fart box, stretch your asshole out to where all your farts will be silent. No one will hear you fart again!'

Kevin is ugly in a way that makes women feel unsafe.

Metoidioplasty has me wondering if I should call the United Nations and Human Rights Watch to report FGM.

 

[Black Man Underwear]

@Muttley

Indentured Servitude could be the GREATEST THING that ever happened to you

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

Its the worse kind of bad, its completely mediocre.

 

[8mm Cunningham]

I'm not an incel though, I'm involuntary celibate

 

[AltisticRight]

They [JEWS] have already Ready replaced Christ in the west with Santa Claus and the Easter bunny and are not far from replacing churches with Starbucks and McDonald’s.

 

[Aunt Carol]

It looks like an ass with a flower coming from it, and it smells faintly like vanilla.

I miss Jingles, but I think Jingles died of AIDS.

 

[DiggieSmalls]

stop trying to get me angry, it won't work.