random_text.txt

[JustSomeDong]

@Prism42 you shouldn't have wished upon that monkey's paw.

Oh, wait, you're a zoomertard. Lemme translate that:

Monkey's paws ain't bussin fr fr no cap you finna be a lolcow fr

 

[retard strength II]

"for juneteenth someone should send me burger money"

 

[D_Tractor]

Everyone posting in the KingCobraJFS thread has their own sweet and unsweet teas to struggle with.

 

[MetokurGroomedMe]

rather than just laughing at the accelerator getting stuck on, or maybe pointing out the issues with pure digital motor systems, they have convinced themselves that since Ford returned from Hyperborea with the Yakubian Automobile, you have never been able to engage the accelerators and the brakes at the same time.

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

Skimming through the second part there's a part where Vegeta becomes a cow and Goku drinks Vegeta's milk and then Vegeta starts eating shit?

 

[UnsufficentBoobage]

I would buy the entire Internet and ban it.

source: i fucking love hotdogs.

They started in the slave trade and when they couldn't do that any more, they branched out into furniture stores.

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

Every time you started it up, there was just a giant ad in the middle. Usually some menacing-looking black guy to advertise whatever new basketball or football game was out, regardless of what you actually played. So that was unpleasant.

 

[HyperboreanRightsActivist]

BBC Pidgin is far more racist than anything that has ever been posted on this forum

she won’t flash at the 9/11 memorial

> not enough niggers in trees

I have an idea. Hear me out:

Sheridan Woman Pulled Knife After Twerking Battle Gone Wrong

 

[KiwiFuzz2]

I don't think you know what A-Logging and weening actually mean.

Both his fans and his detractors are, for the most part, absolutely retarded.

That he's single-handedly made everything more retarded is impressive.

Two women having sex just isn't as hot when they're both men.

Well, one has six boobs, the other just has six wings. Tough call.

Jesus Goddamn Motherfucking Tap Dancing Christ on a cracker. I think that's enough Kiwi Farms for today.

We whites are so much of a superior race that when we want to be disgusting looking, we mop the floor with all of the other races at being disgusting looking.

The power of one. The power of two. The power of many... racists.

Man can't drive around with his animal bang bus anymore without being harassed by the police and SPCA? I thought this was America.

You know, in my decades of staring at the abyss of the internet's underbelly, it never occurred to me that someone would find vulture sex arousing. Especially not to the point where there would be a guy pimping out a vulture on his hillbilly bangbus.

That's fedposting, not alogging. Enjoy prison.

Is that Spotemgottem? That nigga has been on my mind. No cap, I been thinking about that time when I barebacked him raw in a Boca Raton Air BnB. That shit had to be the tightest, blackest, wettest bussy I've ever laid pipe into. I swear to God, the most heavenly high is gargling that wonderboy's nuts while going fist deep into his shitter. I had Spotemgottem screaming in the sheets with head too ridiculous to ignore. That nigga frotted my cock until he busted on my mouth, I had to return the favor. That nigga Spotemgottem and I been fucking non-stop ever since, but keep that shit on the DL. He does that shit for free. If you're gonna ask me how to "long" Spotemgottem, I'll be deadass. All you gotta do is ask, be straight up, and get physical real quick. Touch his nuts, get on ya knees, talk your shit. He doesn't play around with no pansy-ass niggas either. He likes his men manly, and his dick thick. Dark skin, 6'5 is the minimum and I ain't talking about height boy. That nigga Spotemgottem stole my heart and drank my seed.

Red pills can't melt steel beams

What if we've had it backwards this whole time, and 9/11 Did Bush..?

Don't mess with glownigger ops.

Twerking Gone Wrong

Definitely not the remake of the beat it music video I was expecting

 

[Azdy]

So just because I slept with a dog means that my advice means nothing? Ok I will remember that when I answer the calls from people who are about to kill themselfs

 

[Thomas Eugene Paris]

That's the grimace of a cuck, right there. That's not a man who's in on the action. That's a man who's watching another sped bang his girl from the corner.

 

[Tablet County]

Brevity is the soul of wit. Allow me to demonstrate.

This thread is a gay nigger. I would not have sex with it.

It's in fact an extension of the weeb-faggot cultural superstructure

hatred of pedophiles is the one thing that unites absolutely everybody who isn't one of them.

 

[The Rats in the Walls]

Imagine being offered cocaine and a contraption from a man behind an Arby's dumpster. He says he's a grifter. He says what he's holding will change your life. He's hollering about a balldo and a "sexy second family," and he says, "Ralph raped a gal back here in 1993" and he raises his eyebrows and grins like he wants you to join him.

Imagine kneeling on his neck until he dies from a cocaine overdose because you're an off duty cop who couldn't order at Denny's so you went to Arby's instead.

 

[Mourning_Cloak]

There's a little coomer in all of us.

He's on the search for Viagra for his very limp e-penis.

 

[Gentlebastard]

Imagine transitioning, in his own words, from a mediocre (white) male to Weird Al Yankovic (alternatively King Charles II of Spain) but instead of having talent and charm, he's just your average online tranny regurgitating posts from r/traaaaaaaans and seething about gamer chuddies.

So he once looked up Epstein-Barr virus and now his phone has this on autocorrect. Congrats fatso, you outed yourself for having an STI.

The ridiculousness of arguing with your own toilet is something that would make most people cringe and take a long hard look at what the fuck has gone wrong with their life but Rick just keeps soldiering on, the most dedicated clown in the Rodeo.

I walked to my dirt bike I've had since I was a child, and like I was 15 again, just to make sure, I tested that in fact, I could 100% eat shit like when I was figuring out how to do a wheelie.

since Ford returned from Hyperborea with the Yakubian Automobile, you have never been able to engage the accelerators and the brakes at the same time

Dangit, tried to get some AI video fodder for Fatrick Scat porn and wound up summoning the pig's mexican stunt double from the Tomlinson Multiverse

I want to be very clear about this: this is why we called things "retarded" before Current Year. This is why "retarded" was such a common part of our vocabulary in the before times. It is for this precise instance.

This is someone who is not been called "fucking retarded" enough in their lives.

"No Stalker child, we did NOT have gay sex, pegging me is reserved for my wife"

He could have lead with how the snack is a Milwaukee original but insted - racism! Somehow salty spiced bread is racist.

Women can be sexy in boxers. Just not women with dicks.

I had Pat "Nooo child"ing Josiah on a loop as my ring tone but I've had to change it because one of the guys was in my office when it went off and he asked me

"why do you have soundclips from a gay porn as your ring tone?"

I miss Uncle Ben. Him and Bill Cosby were my first experiences with black people as a child. I liked them both.

 

[BirdUp]

Are you 100% sure, my liege?

 

[Aunt Carol]

I'm not saying you shouldn't feel bad for retards, I'm just saying there's no helping some people.

 

[Tablet County]

I had Pat "Nooo child"ing Josiah on a loop as my ring tone but I've had to change it because one of the guys was in my office when it went off and he asked me

"why do you have soundclips from a gay porn as your ring tone?"

Three medallions for the GaymerGayte kings under the Internet (uppercase I,)

Seven for the Bloodsports lords in streaming halls alone,

Nine for Anime Fans who coom & die,

One for the Chris chan, upon his dark throne

In the Land on Branchland, where the Sonichu lie.

One medallion to rule them all,

One medallion to find them,

One medallion to bring them all,

and in the autism bind them,

In the Land of Branchland, where the Sonichu lie

 

[Windy Moors]

Cog is not a pedophile because his brothers are not invited to Christmas.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

I now firmly believe that Lodi zinfandel is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.