Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off

[XYZpdq]

he's a brand obsessed person.

WELL THEN HE IS LOST!
all you can do now is hold him down to record his screams

It's like someone binged-watched Cooking with Jack and said: "You know what? This shit looks too edible to me."


ADDENDUM: In recognition of Billy Dee being based:

View attachment 1038354

works every time!

 

[Kiwi Lime Pie]

"But what I was talking about was about men getting in touch with their softer side of themselves. There’s a phrase that was coined by Carl G. Jung, who was a psychiatrist, who was a contemporary of Sigmund Freud, and they had a splitting of the ways because they had different ideas about the … what do you call it? Consciousness. Unconscious. It’s collective unconsciousness. But he coined a phrase that’s, ‘Anima animus.’ And anima means that is the female counterpart of the male self, and the animus is the male counterpart of the female. So that's what I was referring to."

It became more clear that Williams truly didn't know what gender fluidity was, as it seemed he had conflated it with sexual fluidity.

"I was talking about men getting in touch with the female side of themselves. I wasn’t talking about sex, I wasn’t talking about being gay or straight," he said. "People should read [Jung]. I mean, it would be an interesting education for a lot of people."

With BDW being born in the 30's, he probably experienced true discrimination and segregation firsthand as opposed to what passes as any form of oppression today (i.e. hurt fee-fees). If so, this undoubtedly shaped his opinion and beliefs that people simply need to get along without regard to any extraneous factors.

It wouldn't surprise me one bit if he has no desire to drink the SJW kool aid and probably had no idea people would take his original quotes and try to claim he was genderfluid or somehow endorsed their ideas on gender when all he was saying is that some men occasionally embrace their creative or softer side and some women embrace macho stuff and it doesn't affect who or what they are in the grand scheme of things. Of course this will put the SJW folks in a conundrum; they could claim erasure but it's usually verboten to criticize pocs -- a nice little paradox indeed. Thanks, Based Billy Dee.

Williams is a fucking national treasure. Now watch Tumblrites shittalk him for being afrophobic or whatever nonsensical accusation they have in store. The term "internalized white supremacy" will be used, too.

But Williams doesn't give a shit, he just explained, in two short paragraphs, why Solo is shit. Why the new trilogy doesn't work. And why no one is going to have fond memories of this trilogy just 5 years in the future while the OT will forever be a cherished high point of Hollywood history and a timeless classic that people will be able to watch and enjoy in 50 years.

I'm sure they'll find something to scREEch at about in what he said. However, BDW is old-school enough that he'd not afraid to tell it like it is. The best part: he's right. In trying to make Lando more woke in Rogue One, they completely ignored the essence of Lando's character (IOW, what makes Lando Lando). It's quite pleasing to see BDW call this out.

THEY CHANGED HIS PRONOUNS BACK
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

"I'm just a guy who likes fast flying machines and Colt 45. Why mess with good things?"

Also in other news, Lando is not Lando's real name according to Disney. His real name is Baron Balthazar Landonis Calrissian III Esq... Wouldn't that just be hilarious if Disney keeps retconning the names of characters. Han Solo is actually just Han (real last name unknown but probably stupid), Leia is actually Maricia Leiaus Organa Morgania, Luke is actually Altho Lukemus Sky Walker and C-3PO is actually C-Unit-345-PO. Would ensure their ultimate status as donut steals.

Who seriously comes up with this trash? These names remind me of the fake taxonomy names we'd see at the beginnings of each Roadrunner vs. Wile E. Coyote cartoon where it's obvious the Latin taxonomy names are as fake as can be, but viewers go along with the gag aspect of it. This looks like a failed tryhard attempt at making up taxonomy-style names for these characters that is beyond awful.

Alright niggas, I'm back from cooking! I told you all I'd fix up Disney's shitty wraps, and I did! Here we are:

Awesome job, @vertexwindi. These actually look edible and worth trying. Your recipse is also simple enough that one who migh tnot like the spices/seasonings could simply swap what's listed with whatever they'd prefer instead and still have a palatable wrap. However, I'm curious about one thing:

250kg/551lbs ground beef

Did you really use 551 pounds of ground beef? I suspect a misplaced decimal point.

Edit: @vertexwindi has subsequently corrected the amount of ground beef needed for the recipe.

I don't know. I'm starting to doubt it will be received as a dumpsterfire by the general public.

It's all but given there will be Disney and SW shills touting Episode IX as hard as they can on social media to hype it up as a must-see film -- especially since it capstones the trilogy. There will also be those that aren't shills that feel compelled to watch any sort of SW production. While I'm not sure how many people outside of here have already written off the film as a dumpster fire, it will be interesting to see how many are brave enough to say so on social media after viwing it on the silver screen knowing full well there will be tons of other people ready to tell them how wrong, misogynistic and (whatever)-ist they are for hating the film and the (allegedly) diverse characters contained therein.

 

[Jaimas]

works every time!

I haven't seen an un-fuck-up that glorious since Bill Belichick un-buttfumbled on a paper napkin.

 

[vertexwindi]

Did you really use 551 pounds of ground beef? I suspect a misplaced decimal point.

Woop you're right, I'll adjust that.

 

[XYZpdq]

Did you really use 551 pounds of ground beef? I suspect a misplaced decimal point.

see this is why you ain't swole

 

[Honka Honka Burning Love]

Now, here is a real example of Disney cooking the books.

Verizon gives you a year of free Disney+ with a new phone.

I am SURE Disney is totally not counting Verizon customers that aren't paying anything towards "subscribers"

 

[Creep3r]

Do it, would be GREAT advertising for a legitimately good cookbook. Find some recipes that are somewhat similar by your estimation and compare them, rather than just posting all of the book.

Okay. Also I just found out that UESP has uploaded a few of the recipes.

Here's a new Galaxy's Edge recipe alongside an Elder Scrolls recipe.

Here we have the Felucian Garden Spread. Its a vegan dish made made from tomato, cucumbers, leftover ronto wraps, and falafels made from soy and chickpeas, all served on a gray mud-like hummus. The ones in the park actually look worse, let me show you:

VS what they looked like in lying promotional material:

As you can see, the cookbook uses neither of these images.

The ones in the park aren't even made in their kitchens, they're actually a store bought vegan meatball brand.

The lore behind this crap is that they simply slapped the name Felucia (the giant forest jungle/flower planet from EpIII) onto it and called it a day without even using any actual ingredients or references from any lore in both Disney or old canon. The article is just the ugly Chef Cookie talking about going there before talking about Orange Yoda who gets referenced far too many times for her own good.

For comparison, here is The Elder Scrolls recipe for Kwama Egg Quiche.

Its a yummy and creamy egg quiche served on rye pie crust.

The lore behind this focuses on Morrowind. The Kwama are a species of monstrous bugs that can mature into bugmen who first appeared in TESIII: Morrowind. They exist as a hivemind and are farmed by Dunmer for their eggs or shells. Their eggs are a delicacy to dunmer. The cook book references the Red Year (first mentioned in the 2009 novel The Infernal City), the horrible period right before TESV when the Red Mountain erupted and devastated much of Morrowind, forcing many Dunmer to flee and migrate to other regions, mostly Skyrim. With them they brought animals from Morrowind, including Kwamas and Kwama eggs, which has caused Kwama egg meals to be introduced to the rest of Tamriel. The eggs look gross as shit but they're tasty to every race.

bu

but ackbars home planet is mon cala....

Technically the name Dac came first, but it and Mon Cala were interchangeable. Under Disney its just called Mon Cal or Mon Cala.

 

[cecograph]

I'm sorry, but punching somebody through a steel helmet and suffering no damage is ridiculous to me.

That film "The King" about Henry V pissed me off there. It was probably the most interesting attempt at depicting realistic close-quarters combat between knights in the middle ages, but at one point, Henry just starts bare-knuckle punching the crap out of guys in helmets.

 

[Cyril Sneer]

Also Bacca has yet to respond to the assblasting he received after he chimped out at me.

LOL, like you didn't chimp out at him first.

I want to say I really hate the fictional author of this cookbook. The section before the actual recipe is written like the vapid and slimy copy compilers of online recipe collections use to pad the page to increase time on page for seo. The creepily conversational tone and unwanted anecdotes about things they imply I should love and cherish but are in fact completely foreign give me an "ancient distant relative crashed a family function and wants to smoooooooch" vibe. Ewww.

You're making me nostalgic for the West End Games RPG sourcebooks. So many wonderful little anecdotes and asides about people living their day-to-day lives in the Galaxy (alongside the absolutely autistically-detailed game rules).

How the fuck you gonna sell someone with edges to 8 year olds? This is obviously designed to look as non threatening as possible so parents would want to buy the plastic/styrofoam toy for their kids. This "dagger" looks so unknifely by design, so that the toy can be sold even in countries like Britain where anti-knife hysteria is the current year ideology. You people keep making the same mistake of forgetting Star War are TOY ADVERTS and not actual films made for the enjoyment of adult audience.

It looks kind of like someone cut a chunk out of one of the Jedi Temple Library's data-cores, weirdly enough...

Except this idea is stupid. Way back when, when "Hook" came out it had Peter Pan with a sword. The sword looked at least as sharp as your usual Hollywood sword in the movie. They also released a toy sword for kids, I only remember this because a cousin got one for Christmas, it was understandably rounded for kids to smack each other with. They didn't NERF it in the actual move ffs.

There was a rather funny moment in the Power Rangers episode of The Toys That Made Us where one of Bandai's designers for the Super Sentai toys noted that the toy weapons (which were apparently also used as props on the TV show?) had to be redesigned for the American market because they didn't meet US toy safety standards in their original Japanese form.

Here is my "official" review of the Mandalorian. I'm sure after this, @GeneralFriendliness and I will duel with pistols at dawn.

Covering the first 4 episodes.

First, I will confess that I'm partially biased since the show has contained references to the Ewok movies, especially the 2nd one, "Battle for Endor." (which isn't that bad)

The Ewok movies are a great stepping-stone for kids "into a larger world" of stories that take place outside of the main plot of Skywalkers, Sith and Jedi.

I know we want to bring up "knock offs" of the original, but the show demonstrates some effort to make the knock offs their own characters. The protagonist doesn't feel like Boba Fett with a new paint job, but a member of Boba Fett's people - thus a design that looks similar, but distinct. (this is aided more by the 3rd episode's introduction of additional mandalorians with their own similar - yet distinct - looks)

Good to know, I guess. The initial trailers made it look very much like Pascal, or his stunt doubles, were trying very hard (and failing) to replicate the very calculated way that Jeremy Bullock would move in the Boba Fett costume.

If you really remember the Gary Stu that Boba used to be...

Was he, though? In the books/comics, Boba Fett was generally depicted as a cold, detached, unlovable mercenary whose only interest in life was bounty hunting and whose only real redeeming quality was that he had a vestigial sense of honor that could occasionally be appealed to. I mean, he's the best in the galaxy, yeah, but at the cost of basically having become this dehumanized machine that exists only to hunt (and then buy upgrades to hunt better).

There are problems with the writing separate and apart from the Warsy.

Spoiler: intense sperging, turn back now

What really drives me nuts is that stories will violate this all the time and I swear its getting worse. You'll see it pop up from time to time in this show and I can't tell whether Feloni or Favrau is bad at this.

Gonna guess Filoni, because wolfaboo.

It's not that she's female, it's that she just kicks the Mando's fully-armored ass "because she's awesome", a classic Mary Sue trait. There's nothing that special or interesting about the character other than a throwaway line about her being an ex-Rebel turned merc. For the time being, Cara Dune looks more like a vehicle for getting Gina Carano--a literal stronk female--into the show.

She also looks rather like a Donut Steel version of Ailyn Vel, Boba Fett's estranged daughter in the EU:

Female mercenary with pale skin, long, dark hair, hash-mark tattoos, blue/black costume color-scheme and an antagonistic relationship with a faceless Mandalorian bounty hunter?

 

[ComeoutandJULAY]

Billy Dee Williams is continuing to grow more based.

View attachment 1038184

Full Interview with Rolling Stone

I mean, it's funny and all, but it continues to beg the question: out of all the legacy actors involved in this trilogy, who the hell had a good time filming it?

We already know Mark Hamill's grievances with how Luke was handled, Harrison Ford was only in it because it fulfilled his 30+-year-old wish that Han would die, Carrie Fisher is on record calling Rian Johnson an "asshole," Anthony Daniels gave his piece (and he's in all nine of the main movies), and now this shit with Billy Dee. That really only leaves Ian McDiarmid/Palpatine and Frank Oz/Yoda (Peter Mayhew/Chewie is no longer with us, so he can't say anything). Who liked this trilogy?

Let's just hope the paychecks they've been getting are good.

 

[RomanesEuntDomus]

Box office tracking set to $200,000,000.
The first reshoot alone cost more than that.

I'm still not buying the "The re-shoots cost 300 Million" bullshit. You could make 2 AAA-tier movies with that budget and still have spare change for hookers and blow.
I'm not an expert on these matters, but I doubt that this movie somehow ballooned to half a billion dollars due to reshoots alone.

Wait, if being Darth Vader's daughter was enough to sink Leia's career, what the hell is it going to do to Rey if she's actually Palpatine's granddaughter?

She'll have to live as a mud farmer for the rest of her life. But given she's a Mary Sue, I guess she'll be so awesome at growing crops in the desert, the Lars Homestead will look like this after a year:

The worst about all these foods are the washed out, pastell colors. It looks like a bland tasting, unappetizing, mush without anything really sticking out.

 

[Old Man Mario]

And speaking of merch, this is what most claim the SW sections at their local Walmart look like right now.
View attachment 1038021
This is just sad compared to how these shitty aisles were filled with crap right before TFA and TLJ. Maybe this is why they're letting appliance and beauty product companies make SW merch, they're probably stupid enough to pay a lot for the rights to make this crap while Hasbro suffers.

Yes those stupid gold figures are warming the pegs hard.

Mostly the 6 inch black series figures (if your Wal-Mart even carries them) are stuff left over from Solo and Rey from the Ruin of Skywalker.

I mentioned previously that you can't find any Mandalorian characters at all. Even Cara Dune is gone.

They've also released a Wal-Mart exclusive Jabba's Palace Luke and a force ghost Yoda. The Yoda sells better than TROS merch but I think the force ghost figures just don't sell well. Not since the exclusive Obi-Wan in the 90s.

The Jabba Palace Luke has a great Face Sculpt and they sell pretty quick.

As for the rest of the toy aisle, boy toys are down to 1/4 action figures and an aisle of hot wheel type cars. Meanwhile, you've got about 4 aisles of dolls and girl toys. Either boys play with toys less nowadays or they want people to buy dolls for boys. I'm willing to bet on either.

Currently the old Kenner toys are worth a little less than they were about 10 years ago. Either Disney is hurting the market because no one cares anymore or with so many mom and pop toy stores going to eBay the market is flooded. I'm also willing to bet on either.

 

[Miller]

How are you supposed to kill someone with that hunk of plastic? It looks less sharp than a butter knife and would probably snap in that middle bit if you tried to stab someone with it. THIS IS A UNIVERSE WITH BLADES THAT CAN CUT THROUGH BLAST DOORS, WHY ARE THEY USING THIS STUPID CHUNK OF FUCK?
I thought the Sith dagger would be sleek, red, and black, you know, like a Sith Dagger would look like. Something made out of obsidian with jagged edges and a silver or gold hilt, with ominous red runes carved in the flat, not a goddamn toy spaceship with a handle glued on the bottom.

This "dagger" looks so unknifely by design

This dumb design reminds me of what the Kurtzman's crew came up with when they redesigned the Klingons in STD. They've changed the bat'leth, an iconic weapon made for close combat, now it looks like an over-designed piece of crap with the sharp ends facing the person who is holding the weapon.
Here's an idea of how these retards think (it starts at 2:13 with the original designer then the STD one).

 

[AnOminous]

It wouldn't surprise me one bit if he has no desire to drink the SJW kool aid and probably had no idea people would take his original quotes and try to claim he was genderfluid or somehow endorsed their ideas on gender when all he was saying is that some men occasionally embrace their creative or softer side and some women embrace macho stuff and it doesn't affect who or what they are in the grand scheme of things. Of course this will put the SJW folks in a conundrum; they could claim erasure but it's usually verboten to criticize pocs -- a nice little paradox indeed. Thanks, Based Billy Dee.

Troons are worse than Mormons. At least Mormons wait until you're dead to try to baptize you and turn you into one of them when you don't want to be.

 

[verissimus]

Let's just hope the paychecks they've been getting are good.

Supposedly McDiarmid asked for 30 millions bucks. So considering he probably won't even have say more than 10 minutes of dialogue, I'd say he got a pretty dang good deal.

 

[Flexo]

They found a gene that correlates but only like 15% of the time

Not sure 15% really counts as correlation...

It's not that she's female, it's that she just kicks the Mando's fully-armored ass "because she's awesome", a classic Mary Sue trait. There's nothing that special or interesting about the character other than a throwaway line about her being an ex-Rebel turned merc. For the time being, Cara Dune looks more like a vehicle for getting Gina Carano--a literal stronk female--into the show.

There could be a debate on "kicks ass" since the fight ends with them pulling guns on each other. Mando definitely got solid hits in.

Mow if you're complaining about her hitting in the head while he's wearing a helmet... Well I find that stupid too that bugs me, but it has been a thing in SW for awhile, just look at RotJ.

I mean if Kyle Katarn just came in and decked the Mando in the head, it would've been just as weird and insulting to the Mando. It's still a case of "here comes my awesome character to beat up the hero", except now that Hollywood has tired people out on their "strong whamen" horseshit, people like me are more inclined to scrutinize the latest "badass female character" the powers-that-be want to cart out. Star Wars and Terminator have made me lose my patience with this shit.

Nah, that would have been understandable since no armor can stop Kyle. He shaves with his lightsaber after all.

As for the Mando's other fights: With the Jawas there were like 10-20 of them in a giant fuckoff tank he had to deal with, and the Mudhorn was a giant beast he had to kill. And even that fight I still don't buy 100%, partly because I'm not on board yet with Filoni's Force-wielding babies, the Mando sat on his ass too much, and I don't understand how his dinky little knife actually killed the thing. The Blergs at least caught him off guard a la Luke and the Sand People in Star Wars, which I could accept but still looked somewhat improbable. It's a huge pack animal, how does it sneak up on you from the front? Point being the Mando, while very satisfying for the first 3 episodes, has more problems than just creeping woke, and I've been waiting since Episode 1 for just that sort of thing to start happening.

Yeah, the dagger into the mudhorn made me double take too.

Part of the problem with a helmeted character is that we're not sure how old this guy is supposed to be. If the protagonist is supposed to be kind of young and still green, then it works. If he's supposed to be older and more world weary... then he should be more skilled.

Though i do enjoy watching a hero at least work to earn their victories. Not like.... You know who.

 

[verissimus]

God, I can't get past the 30 minute mark on this video without cringing : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=54Kfk4KSvZs

Why are there even Sith Assassins to begin with or are they Palpatine clones too? Again, that kind of crap would have been real useful to have either during the prequel or original trilogy era.

Edit - some time stamps
1) At around 1:19:00 to 1:21:00 ..."ghost hands"...you know what I'll leave it at that for you guys to react to how about that?
2) Around 1:23:00...omfg JJ. So now apparently Luke (and Leia) knew about Rey's dark origins but chose to accept her. But of course they did! Why wouldn't they accept a supposed clone (almost typed clown) of Palpatine while either trying to abandon or kill Soylo? No wonder he turned to the dark side. He ain't having none of the feminist preferential bullcrap.

Edit 2
God the world-building to this trilogy is so bad. Wtf can we assume even happens after this trilogy? What happens to either the Jedi or Sith in general? Do they really just fade out of existence? Does Rey train the next generation for better or for worse? Does some fanatical group decide to kidnap and clone her for their army? What about the Republic? How does order get re-established if it even does? What happens with the other characters (not that we really care)? I mean I understand the original trilogy didn't give us much at the time (that is just before the Expanded Universe stuff), but it wasn't too hard to guess or build off of what did happen. Here we either get nothing or we can't assume anything really positive (or entertaining) should happen.

 

[Reverend]

She also looks rather like a Donut Steel version of Ailyn Vel, Boba Fett's estranged daughter in the EU:

Female mercenary with pale skin, long, dark hair, hash-mark tattoos, blue/black costume color-scheme and an antagonistic relationship with a faceless Mandalorian bounty hunter?

I see the Marvel crossover has begun with Domino coming to Star wars...

X-FORCE CONFIRMED! DEADPOOL IS A JEDI! FUCK YES!

 

[Poe-Shen Zcela]

I haven't seen an un-fuck-up that glorious since Bill Belichick un-buttfumbled on a paper napkin.

Billy "The Space D" Williams uncucked himself faster than The Nerd.

I mean, it's funny and all, but it continues to beg the question: out of all the legacy actors involved in this trilogy, who the hell had a good time filming it?

We already know Mark Hamill's grievances with how Luke was handled, Harrison Ford was only in it because it fulfilled his 30+-year-old wish that Han would die, Carrie Fisher is on record calling Rian Johnson an "asshole," Anthony Daniels gave his piece (and he's in all nine of the main movies), and now this shit with Billy Dee. That really only leaves Ian McDiarmid/Palpatine and Frank Oz/Yoda (Peter Mayhew/Chewie is no longer with us, so he can't say anything). Who liked this trilogy?

Let's just hope the paychecks they've been getting are good.

Don't forget about Admiral Ackbar himself, Timothy D Rose:

I hate Rian Johnson with a fucking passion, and I would love to see Cara Dune deck his spherical head.

There could be a debate on "kicks ass" since the fight ends with them pulling guns on each other. Mando definitely got solid hits in.

Mow if you're complaining about her hitting in the head while he's wearing a helmet... Well I find that stupid too that bugs me, but it has been a thing in SW for awhile, just look at RotJ.

Yeah he did get a couple good hits in, but he still went down like a sack of potatoes. Him trying to fry her out of desperation was ludicrous & quickly rendered pathetic when she just steps on his arm. I dunno man, this just reeks of girl power shit, but more than that the whole fight just seemed forced and a little unbelievable even for Star Wars.

Are you referring to the Ewoks knocking Stormtroopers out with rocks to the head? Yeah, I'll give you that. They're cute and silly carnivores though, so I let that slide. The Stormtroopers should've been able to massacre more of them and not go down so easily.

Nah, that would have been understandable since no armor can stop Kyle. He shaves with his lightsaber after all.

If you're going to make a Gary Stu, make him the player character in a videogame and go ham. That's how you do it. I could even just take him as the ex-Imperial merc he was in Dark Forces and leave it at that, no Jedi skills required. He still had to punch a Krayt dragon to death at one point.

Yeah, the dagger into the mudhorn made me double take too.

Part of the problem with a helmeted character is that we're not sure how old this guy is supposed to be. If the protagonist is supposed to be kind of young and still green, then it works. If he's supposed to be older and more world weary... then he should be more skilled.

Though i do enjoy watching a hero at least work to earn their victories. Not like.... You know who.

Oh absolutely. That's why I didn't have any issues with the previous 3 episodes, for the most part. There's just bits here and there that stick out.

 

[Reverend]

This dumb design reminds me of what the Kurtzman's crew came up with when they redesigned the Klingons in STD. They've changed the bat'leth, an iconic weapon made for close combat, now it looks like an over-designed piece of crap with the sharp ends facing the person who is holding the weapon.
Here's an idea of how these exceptional individuals think (it starts at 2:13 with the original designer then the STD one).

Defensive....klingons....defense to a klingon is "Is the other guy dead? Good I can drink blood wine and Fuck"

Why would a klingon, who's sole existence, is to fight and die in battle with honor and glory, think of anything beyond killing their opponent till they are dead?