Make the worst video game movie ever

Sonic is now a group of rogue US Army guys smuggling drugs across ISIS Warlord Insurgent territory, one of them is secretly an islam, one of them is a good real Army guy, one of them is the girl who rejoins the army with the good army guy.
Then Robotnik tries to kill them with robots.

The Rock is somebody in it.
 
Tetris but written by Adam Sandler and directed by Michael Bay.
Close enough
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Honestly if you took out all the characters related to Super Mario Bros. it would just be a generic 90's sci-fi action film/B-Movie. The problem was that the directors behind the movie tried to make it something it wasn't all in the sake of expressing their artistic vision, and Nintendo was desperate enough to ok whatever they had to say, even though everyone else hated it because the directors themselves were mentally retarded children that threw a temper-tantrum if they didn't get their way.


In other words...
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The thing about that movie is for what it was, remove Final Fantasy, it was a neat endeavor. Hilariously every AAA game is coming closer and closer to being one long cutscene which is what Spirits Within was.
 
Live action Phantasy Star Online but instead of Dark Falz being trapped in a ship prison as the villian, they find out that the real enemy was pollution from the mines all along and the original colonists were to blame (make sure this point is incredibly unsubtle with the cast basically looking into the camera blaming the viewer whenever this comes up). To top it off for some reason the entire thing is filmed as if it's a first person shooter with the most generic looking hud.
Oh and the cast is incredibly diverse while the evil pollution colonists from before were all white and this fact must be constantly drawn attention to with the second group that comes to Ragol being essentially space Wakanda who warned the evil white colonists not to pollute Ragol before they set off.
 
A ten part movie series adaptation of the Xeno series (Xenogears, Xenosaga, Xenoblade), each part over 3 hours long.
Written and directed by Alejandro Jodorowsky.

I love Jodo, but NGL this would be the mess of the millenium, Jodorowsky's Dune times a million.
 
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The thing about that movie is for what it was, remove Final Fantasy, it was a neat endeavor.
Graphics-wise, that movie still holds up to this day, and at the time was VERY impressive. A part of me wonders how things would have went if they kept that idea of "Virtual Actress". Aki Ross wasn't that bad looking..

Hilariously every AAA game is coming closer and closer to being one long cutscene which is what Spirits Within was.
Thats because it seems like every AAA publisher would rather make movies than video games. Every David Cage game is a perfect example of that.
 
CGI Undertale. Despite supposedly being for kids there are a lot of adult jokes. Instead of the game's quirky character-driven writing half of the characters make obnoxious quips. Sans gets a lot more screen time because he's the funny meme character but his dialogue is entirely quips and shitty meme references. Alphys is voiced by Amy Schumer. Mettaton is voiced by Jeffree Star. Frisk is not a silent protagonist and becomes more annoying and unlikeable (bonus points: there is gender sperging). The story does not follow the game (and has nothing to do with the game's messaging about choices, morality, or anything of the sort) and ends with a shitty anticlimactic final fight with Chara.

The fandom is 50/50 split on if the movie is the worst thing imaginable or if they absolutely love it.
 
ok so we market a doom movie, get at least 4 minutes of footage we can use in a trailer or 2, then bait and switch the movie for cuties like 1 minute into the film
 
The House of the Dead movie by Uwe Boll but edit out any of the unintentionally funny things like the weird music choices or the spinning people when they die bits.
 
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God of War, but there are no tits, Kratos is a manlet that would rather whine and bitch at how bad his life is than get revenge, and also he's no longer Spartan, because the writers didn't want people to think this had anything to do with 300.
 
A fortnite movie, but a few minutes in it's just executives swimming in their money vault like scrooge Mcduck, nude. Ninja joins them. His pubes are also dyed a cartoon color.
 
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