random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Spud]

I will punch that man's face until he has an appropriate jawline.

 

[Useful_Mistake]

Almost 69 pages and no nussy pics. Shit thread!

A case of trying to smear the good character of Dear Leader Jersh, aggravated by working with the rather hostile competition.

The secret fact that everyone has been concealing and I've only withheld up until now is that Joshua Conner Moon is secretly a NIGGER!

Dyn definitely has the nussy pics but is keeping them for himself like a greedy abbo.

 

[Gentlebastard]

I got my own PC when I was 10 or 11 and even that probably stunted my development (I've ended up on KF, after all).

tl;dr RIP alpacas

I remember when Dear Feeder was called the Final Boss Of Transphobes.

Brought up on a steady diet of "NO FUCK YOU DAD" on the internet,

I've been into DnD for a long-ass time and I miss the days when women had strength penalties. Now we have trans handicapped BIPOC non-binary LGBTQWTFBBQ mutants on the cover of every piece of crap that WotC shits out.

I doubt there is much... marital action going on between those two.

I've seen more convincing breasts on lizards.

His dad is a redditor; he's suffered enough already.

So he is a son of a redditor. He deserves whatever happens to him. If you are the son of a redditor, you are a redditor yourself. Like autism, it is autosomal dominant on the Y chromosome.

Vlad come on. Get the stakes and steal the copper wire from Brussels.

I feel like this was a thing I knew as a youngster and as a young adult; you know, shit like how I couldn't casually threaten to machete someone. This no longer seems to be well understood.

The bane of progressives everywhere: the entirely predictable consequences of their foolish actions.

Due to inflation, it is no longer safe to snort yayo with a rolled up $20. Now you have to use a $50, or preferably a $100.
Soon we will no longer be able to snort off titties. Instead we will be reverting to toilet seats. Truly a dark time.

Junkies frequently sell their smelly man asses for drugs. According to progressives this is desirable for some reason and we should encourage it.

Shaniqua Vorhees had to chase people around her neighborhood with a machete on camera before she even got a whiff of consequences.

That feel when the Urban Dictionary is going from being that silly site you and your friends fucked around with in high school to being taken somewhat seriously.

Billions must die no cap frfr, cuh.

The next Terminator movie is just going to be a fat black trans Joanna Conner going on a temper-tantrum when SkyAI keeps misgendering xir and ranks skinny white girls as more objectively attractive.

No matter their sex, penchant for crossdressing, country of origin, colour of their skin, shapes of their face and body, their first language, the organisations of worship they grew up in.... no matter how much money they have or how many educational certificates they have attained or how high a position they manage to reach through nepotism, intimidation, and bribery...


...they will always a nigger and there is absolutely nothing anyone can do to change this.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

I've never really thought "internet daddy simulator" was the appropriate figure for internet father figures

 

[Shard]

If you don't know Soviet history you are fucking gay and do not deserve being spoonfed.

 

[Larry David's Opera Cape]

I feel like this was a thing I knew as a youngster and as a young adult; you know, shit like how I couldn't casually threaten to machete someone. This no longer seems to be well understood.

 

[RACISM]

as much as I hate kiwifarms, I love kiwifarms, and can't stay away because there's nowhere left on the internet where the people are worth talking to.

 

[Shiny Shroodle]

My fetish is putting my penis in vaginas. We need a flag for my disgusting fetish ASAP or I'll feel like I'm being genocided.

Ayo homeboy, you ever had yo dick sucked by a abstract painting?

 

[Meat Target]

Ay Tone, I aint no crystal ball readin gypsy, but this guy looks like he wants to stick his pepperoni in little kids' calzones, ya know?

I hope the next glowop has someone dressed like a juggalo.

 

[Gentlebastard]

While he embodies all 7 of the Deadly Sins, gluttony is his master.

Uncle Ted was right.

Imagine hitting that age where the thinkie-thinkie parts of the brain starts kicking in and realizing you were breast fed by a fetished porn-sick male.

These people are literally impersonating very small children and while it may not be explicitly pedophilia... it's in the same neighborhood (hell, I'm pretty sure it's on the same street).

Since we are discussing a child abandoning their trans parent here's another

I wouldn't believe a word coming from his snout.

"I just don't understand why you hate people"
You're not making it any easier, you dumb bitch.

Do those black pills come in cherry flavored chewables?

Don't give these freaks any more ideas. We don't need them transitioning fucking animals next.

You know it's a top-quality place when you've got soybean oil, HFCS and propylene glycol in the sauce.

Please tell me he's trying to just ragebait people and that's one of those uncanny realistic dolls or something please please please arghhhhhh

How this person has custody I have no idea, but inshallah CPS will be involved soon

That's not much of a silver lining but I've got to cling to it

How much of a degenerate do you have to be to let this man anyway near your erotic imagination?

If you gave me this video I'd have told you it's a fucking joke. But it's real.

I'm so excited, that was my favorite retard trend to come out of tumblr.

I've heard Eastern European dubs that had more emotion.

Have you ever been misgendered by a child so hard that you threw a quesadilla at the wall

 

[Useful_Mistake]

they tried to bait-and-switch them into watching a nigger movie.

"Oi mate, you got yer nigger loicense?"

I pee in toilets.

You only need a license if you intend to participate in live interaction or conversation with blacks. If you are simply recalling prior memories of interactions with blacks, or are discussing blacks with other non-blacks in a private setting, no license is necessary. Please be aware that delaying interaction with blacks, by shouting at them across the street, or retreating from an encounter, still counts as live interaction at the point of reception, so a license will still be necessary. If you require further information, or have any questions regarding the blacks license, please contact our License Helpline on 020 69 64 44 37, or visit our website at htps://nigteractionlicense.capita.co.uk/info.

 

[IamnottheNSA]

we need to catch him in international waters and rape him

 

[Useful_Mistake]

I got called Racist because I can't return food without a receipt.

how hard is to cast a good looking black chick with big tits?

This bitch is only famous because her parents would let anyone tap her jailbait ass

And everybody knows (((producers))) have a thing for dark meat

Bitch got so much surgery she looks more caucasian than the average russian

no one likes niggers, not even niggers.

 

[Gentlebastard]

Now I gotta give credit to the IRS for once in my lifetime, hope you're happy.

Someone from my job may need to send a health check to my place tomorrow.

I may still be laughing so hard I'll be unable to move.

I'll look after my family, the rest of you can pound sand as far as I'm concerned. Of course if I see you rocking a kiwi patch that's another story.

It's good to know that Black face is the way to go to avoid the surveillance state

I like how the OP is getting demolished by merely playing Devil's Advocate. Perish the thought of having a nuanced discussion.

you have been charged with felony false artist's rendering, enjoy prison.

Kiwifarms wins by doing absolutely nothing.

Well, at least by not harboring chomos and lolicons.

it's nice to know that 5,389 of the DMs include nigger. That is all.

Big story going around about a young graduate student who recently went to a megachurch and convinced all of them to abandon their belief in God with a simple presentation. First, he premised that God could not create an object so big he couldn't lift it, then he pointed to how fat Patirck S. Tomlinson is. They all clapped and instantly became atheists. That student was Norm Macdonald disguised as Albert Einstein.

he waddled back to the Wendy's to bitch about no bacon in the middle of Tornado Watch conditions

I just started reading this thread and goddamn I'm in literal tears.

He's not the real gift giver in the family even. That would be his dad, the gay rodeo clown who introduced AIDS to Africa.

This made up story features a dude not instantly knowing a man was a troon. It like totally happens all the time guys.

you could probably vastly improve society by just gassing all redditors immediately

 

[FBI Neighbor]

Not sure if it's OK to bring in a quote from MATI but one from today is good random text material:

I hope the fires of hell are rainbow-colored

If anyone else was watching and can hook me up with a link to that article on a trans person exposing themselves in front of a school and threatening to inject people with HRT, please hook a brotha' up. Tried searching it on several sites, couldn't find it.

 

[Soggy paper straw]

Impotence is always grandiose,

In Females, by Pulitzer prize winner literary critic, Andrea Long Chu

 

[Larry David's Opera Cape]

Not sure if it's OK to bring in a quote from MATI but one from today is good random text material:



If anyone else was watching and can hook me up with a link to that article on a trans person exposing themselves in front of a school and threatening to inject people with HRT, please hook a brotha' up. Tried searching it on several sites, couldn't find it.

https://reduxx.info/italy-trans-identified-male-arrested-after-stripping-in-front-of-school-threatening-people-with-hiv/

 

[Black Man Underwear]

"Hey, if you're into gay nigger cuckolding, I'm not here to stop you"
-Jewthulu

 

[AirdropShitposts]

The Scottish Enlightenment loved the Kiwi Farms:

 

[Gentlebastard]

Yeah let me tell you a little secret about the mystical Orient that current Hollywood is fundamentally incapable of understanding - all of us in some way or another have a cultural, historical and sexual fetish for crème de caucasiens.

My chud ancestors are smiling at me. Imperial. Can you say the same?

Just give people a happy ending and tits, thats all they want

Some Eurasians are hard to tell. It all depends on the race of the postman.

! ! ! KIWIFARMS EXCLUSIVE ! ! !

NEW info on next big Disney worldwide blockbuster remake: "Lilo and Stinkditch."

I need to watch Stalingrad footage to feel good about the world after that.

By the time I got halfway through the article I began thinking that allowing women to be in public was a mistake.

"Bus stops doesn't give enough shade. Women most affected."

Gender's closed due to AIDS

Is he sick in this new video or did he have another nanostroke that caused enough brain damage to change his voice? He sounds even lower IQ than normal.

Note that chainlink fence. It's not to keep anything in. It's to keep things out, like a certain fat faggot with bitch tits.

We love our ooperator here - but I doubt anyone here would want to bear this sort of infamy.

We can always use another place to say nigger and faggot.

>implying that not every party in your government has the exact same goal of making you a slave of the state
lol
lmfao

I'm probably overthinking the opinions of a person with more strokes than functioning fingers, but how does the Mario movie have "politics" but Rick and Morty doesn't?

Truly novel idea, that, combining alcohol & Irishmen