random_text.txt

[Gentlebastard]

Only the most perverted, hard up, degenerate sex fiend is going to make that trip out to the middle of nowhere.

He expects pretty much everyone to want hookers everywhere

I give all the crabs I cook Ketamine so they go out feeling good.

I said that as a joke but now, I'm actually depressed how probably true it was.

'scuse me, but the guy wasn't a pedo, just a regular sex offender.

The love of a good woman can move mountains.
But a grubby gloved hand job in a seedy double wide trailer 'brothel' is probably just as good!

I mean it killed them instantly, but getting Gaddafi'd isn't exactly how I'd like myself to go out.

Local man transitions into sewer ghoul.

"I got raped by a turtle and alligator at the same time" hands typed these words.

I've always been curious how many farts one has to huff in order to think this way.

I like seeing familiar fellow farmfaggots between the threads, it's like we're racist dinner party buddies.

I'd completely forgotten about this ancient meme, and now here it is in an actually relevant context.

TLDR; nuke China.

The merge was real and the lolcowification of the world continues.

 

[vomitusdeux]

At least she isn't pregnant with Null's baby

I ate hot chip today
To see if I still feel

You should do a dissertation on the true nature of Sissy fetishism.

Ramming a nail into a usb port is more genuine than anything you and your gay little classmates did.

In fact, if we had her nudes when we were torturing the masterminds behind 9/11 perhaps we would have been able to bring Osama to justice without getting involved in Afghanistan.

(furfag literally shits in a public pool)

THE BEATINGSCUCKING WILL CONTINUE UNTIL MORALE IMPROVES

Did we ever find out how Emily killed the pope btw?

Anyway, I assume that the black guy comes home hoping he can become a furry too and she just says "Get a job nigger.".

Gentlemen, what is the charge? Eating a cake? A succulent Hitler cake?

Real men can touch their Weiner to the floor.

Since we're talking about seafood, it has come to my attention recently that black women often wash their vag with harsh soaps while being loudly disgusted by the suggestion that water is enough.

The ever present pooner trait of not being able to fucking format a paragraph really needs to be studied.

sign up now and get 30 percent off a bulk order of Kraft singles

Are we gonna get a Cooking with Zoella stream where she puts a used diaper in the oven?

Forgive me for not knowing how lesbians get down in bed.

Stop arguing about diapers and have a cat

I always appreciated his choices in stomachs he would shoop himself into

Does she use utensils to eat cat litter?
There are...concerned parties who want to know.

I can be utterly consumed by penis envy and also be transphobic. It's not a conflicting trait

I don't know how that's physically possible. One of her tits is up under her armpit and her other udder hangs down to her deep sexy bellybutton.

 

[Cnidarian]

And then everyone would call him a pedo dogfucker and he’d shit himself with rage. That’s the kind of wholesome fun you just don’t get these days.

 

[Dr. Butt]

OBSERVE MICHAEL CORLEONE.

 

[JustSomeDong]

"Hardin could be here" he thought, "I've never been in this Circuit before. There could be Hardins anywhere." The desert wind felt good against his bare teeth. "I HATE HARDIN" he thought. I Don't Get You Taylor Swift reverberated his entire car, making it pulsate even as the $5 energy drink circulated through his powerful thick skull and washed away his (merited) fear of lawyers after dark. "With a whore, you can fuck anywhere you want" he said to himself, out loud.

 

[GamerGateSurvivor]

Context unecessary.
View attachment 7363247

these critics and haters and ableists on Kiwi Farms

 

[S.C.U.D.]

Kiwifarms is among the worst collection of inhuman monsters on the internet and the day Joshua Moon is finally arrested and the site shut down permanently will be a victory for all of humanity

 

[Pedophobe]

If your best method to reinforce your self worth is to talk about how much better you are than some freakshow on the chris chan forums, you are probably not very far above them.

The merge was real and the lolcowification of the world continues.

I want to say watching him spiral in real time is instructive, cautionary, and sad, but what really comes to mind is that it's entertaining.

 

[Warai Otoko]

I'm aware, that's why lighter males are more desirable.

 

[Xarpho's Return]

Everybody hates urban cyclists because they are too slow for roads and too fast for sidewalks and they drive their bikes like they have flashing cop lights on 'em. Your political views don't really affect how you feel when some cycle courier blows a stop sign and plows into you, sending your 25 dollar 'authentic' cheesesteak all over the sidewalk, and also breaking your wrist.

 

[Black Man Underwear]

his cock ain't terrible
I'm just giving another perspective
I'd rate his penis a "Loves Sabra"

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

*takes off my epic spiked trilby and throws it at you like a shuriken* HIYAH!!! *sprints towards you and kicks you five times in the chest*

 

[Pedophobe]

Don't read the article. Just proceed to spew ill-informed 'tism at comments.

The Farms has moderation that's leagues above websites orders of magnitude larger.

Fuck calorie counting! It's time for victory counting!

Are the upcoming decades in a cage really worth all the laughs we've gotten over the years? I'd say yes.

 

[Marc]

are you saying earth isnt a planet? You are a total retard. Stick to baby dick sucking manuals and leave the thinking to people who are able.

 

[Tablet County]

It's like his anti Jew defense boobs explode out of his sides

 

[Diggus Bickus]

I love winning.

 

[DoNotFeedTheSneed]

Curiouser and curiouser...

 

[Sperg Spectating]

His life abusive father was told many times that he was harassing a lil fat boy (me)

Because of people like you, the tip of my left index was deformed as a child, and I had to feel how my nail fell off so it could regrow.

Because of people like you, I have anger issues since the age of 13. I still remember how I almost ruined my math notebook with a pencil and raw, pent up child rage.

I am very clear with what I mean. I want you to prove I jacked off to it.

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

Because of people like you, I have anger issues since the age of 13. I still remember how I almost ruined my math notebook with a pencil and raw, pent up child rage.

 

[Pedophobe]

tl ; dr the internet was a mistake.