random_text.txt

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

i cant believe jump kick man is the legally acceptable name

This doesn't even make sense any more.

You see, I only happened to lie in a way that was very convenient to me on accident because pain meds. Total coincidence man.

THIS IDIOT WAS TWEETING ABOUT THE CASE WHILE IT WAS IN COURT?!??!?!?!??!?!

NO REGERTS

Physical wounds can heal. Spiritual wounds take far longer.

Keep posting nonsense guys this guy is clearly reading the thread

Please for the love of God resist arrest, that would be even more hilarious

If they drag this guy to the stand in handcuffs I will shit and piss and cum

Thank you, God, for making these people stupid.

Desire to say nigger in court intensifies

KKKyle Rittenhouse xtremely large caliber firearm that can shoot through tanks and/or elementary schools.

JUMP KICK MAN

"Is this species of rifle native to the area, or would it have migrated from across state lines?"

"then i took the meanie poopoo rifle and found that it was officially a meanie poopoo rifle used by meanie poopoo racist murderers"

OY VEY ITS ANUDA SHOAH

Lime green and army green are completely fucking opposite shades of fucking green you fucking retards

 

[Lovecraft's Cat]

┏━━┓┏━━┓┏━━┓┏━━┓
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gonna get fucked in my remade vag
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[SCSI]

Man this means that if I kill big bird and fry him up I can't claim it is non GMO food

 

[PhoBingas]

Virgin Odinists vs Chad Servants of Crom

 

[Blackhole]

The creation of Funko Pops in a third world factory uses way less energy than a NFT!

His car COULD NOT PERFORM, could not FUCKING PERFORM, on the road, because he was just busy STREET RACING, so now the piece of shit car is CRASHED, because it's made by bullshit plastic from CHINKS and now LOOK AT THIS BULLSHIT.

Ralph totaled his shart, now comes the cart!

A washed up and talentless cunt
yet again evades death with this stunt.
between the lines he was snorting
he chimes "no aborting!"
this wreck of a man -nay, a gunt

Because KF documents and studies retards, and the future is exceptional.

 

[keyboredsm4shthe2nd]

That's autism for you.

I really wish they would continue their facial recognition program so it could be repurposed for drone strikes. That would be kind of neat.

Reads headline: "On no!"
Reads sub-title: "Hooray!"

Yo dude, if you shake your woman and she squirts... Either you got one kinky lady, or that's not squirt. That's piss. Stop assaulting your lady just because you're horny.

TIL: consequences = rape.

If a woman is squirting out red stuff, then she has a problem.

If your immediate thoughts after reading the instructions on a ketchup bottle are sexual, you need actual, serious help.

Is this faggot speech? Not sure how you give a full-throated bear hug unless we are talking about a different kind of "bear".

I misread that tweet as saying autistic freak pervert at first and now I'm disappointed that's not what it actually says.

Straight men don’t suck dick.

Gayer than a treeful of monkeys on nitrous oxide.

Imagine being a mass shooter who killed less people than a crowd excited to see Drake.

Women are the niggers of gender.

 

[Hitman One]

Truly inspirational. I feel like his gravestone should have a QR code that links to his Twitter account

his eyes would glaze over and he'd start thinking about tranny sex when the doctor starts lecturing him about needing to maintain his mangina.

 

[Cats]

 

[Tard Police]

Take a look at that schnozz!
He's one of (((them)))

 

[BIG BILL HELL'S]

You tell him: poop in the toilet like a real man or you're going to leave. Then do it. File for divorce.

 

[Blackhole]

We gotta fuck up the economy to undo the systematic racism of roads.

It's like roadside Jerry Springer without the bouncer around to stop the trash from killing each other.

"i heard her bash the fuck out of my computer all because I think Roblox is better than her"

"they vill complement mine pretty white drees...and my white lace stockeens..."

 

[Ken Barlow]

If you can’t handle me at my violent manic outburst worst, you don’t deserve me at my greasy methwhore best~

 

[MediocreMilt]

this will be my final post on kiwifarms. i must do this, not only for her but for me. end of the day, i am too gifted and short on time to waste on things like this. time isnt on my side and my health is suffering in a specific way that will be taking me in 2022 if the oracle is to be trusted.

 

[Haffhart]

Focusing on fucking ahegao lions of all things is absolutely bizarre. It's stupid, and pointless, but so are video games...

That's two quotes I've found so far bitching about vidya. What did vidya ever do to you?

 

[Penis Drager]

nobody is stopping you from putting a school uniform on a 20 year old 4 foot 4 Macedonian prostitute

 

[Blackhole]

damn niggas is really outt here performing esoteric luciferian magiks walkin into tha Maw of tha Void hellmouth niggas

 

[thismanlies]

I'd make a really autistic essay on how the Empire was actually better for the galaxy than the New Republic but that would veer us off topic and you don't want to read my autism anyway.

 

[Zero Day Defense]

To think that we live in a society

 

[Law]

Is the shirt also from the diaper babyfur fetish store or what the fuck is it?

I like to read this this with the exaggerated accent of a Brooklyn cab driver.

 

[Zero Day Defense]

There's a lot of faggots here comparing slasher movies not making serial killers and loli not making chomos. All I have to say is I watch a lot of horror movies and played a lot of violent games, not once has it given me a hard on.

Can you say the same when you watch loli?
Think about it.