random_text.txt

[Thomas Eugene Paris]

If only gender-science could build some kind of copium reactor to harness the power of delusional particles, we would have an unlimited source of clean autistic energy.

 

[Gentlebastard]

Chomos need to understand that 99% of people regardless of political affiliation want to see them fed into a wood chipper.

It is a very good thing they are isolated and afraid, they should feel that way.

Honestly I was hoping they were the sort of tranny that posts their floppy flesh sock on Reddit, but alas they are not.

Imagine the reaction if you transported the People of Reddit back to the 1950's.
These faggots would be lynched and the people doing the lynching would be praised.

KRISHNA has concerns about where she shits

I am very sorry you suffered through this, but I enjoyed reading it.

She also said she was quitting comedy, so it's unfortunate to see she hasn't.

She’s quit performing comedy. We are, however, still laughing at her.

Turns out my gestures are neither masc or femme but simply autistic

On the other hand, you're no longer a virgin, and you have the genital herpes to prove it.

“No, stalker. I am not at home fucking my wife. You are the one fucking my wife. Enjoy prison.”

I don’t think he is a child abuser himself. He kills children for food. Not for sexual pleasure.

almost unique among lolcows in that he literally never takes a day off from being hateable

“I have no ill intentions.”

*doxxes family*

"I lurk Kiwi Farms" is starting to become the new "I'm friends with people in Anonymous/on the Dark Web" and I hate it. Please, shut the fuck up.

We find Kiwi Farms to be a bunch of meanypants, therefore we reverse our ruling not based on merit or legalities, but because we are unable to operate as professionals and instead are purely driven by emotional manipulation and baseless conjecture while incessantly needing to feel morally superior

More people should show up to Youtuber's houses. I think every Youtuber should be afraid constantly.

ngl getting a supreme court ruling on greer v moon would be kino

They’re either in denial or they’re masking their coomer/simp nature with political sperging or “he’s a soyboy, I wish she would have shidded and farded on his porch”

On the bright side, this is pretty funny in an stupid way.

I miss the old web before it was completely taken over by corporate interests.

A new era in patposting is dawning, over the top elusive and exclusive perfectly preposterous praise for poorly produced publications.

then someone brings in a low-rent manic pixie girlfriend

His native language are grunts, squeals and crude gesticulation.

might as well go all in on your journey to heccin' valid paralysis

How dare people use my own words against me!

There has got to be a less retarded way to phrase this.

Null banned guns on the Farms and now at least 4 people are dead.

"We didn't listen because we didn't like the tone of voice of the messenger" sure shows that the adults were in the room.

I'm by no means a medical expert, but based on my layman's understanding of human physiology, injecting anything directly into your weiner sounds like a rather poor idea.

 

[prolapsed_cranium]

I'm writing nigger on a forum that's been banished to the fucking nether realm 109 times (and counting).

 

[Hitman One]

Chris died for our sins. REPENT! DEATH TO KIWIFARMS!

 

[Skitarii]

You shipped me with Barbara!

He was in jail for Bella’s crimes.

no happy meals in the slammer

Bella was the real sex criminal

"The Charges, Jerkcop?"

 

[Celebrate Nite]

the only difference between the regulars in BP and the regulars in A&N is the frequency in which the word “nigger” is used.

 

[The Evil Midnight Bomber]

@Catgirl Tyranid: "I hope you inhale a little spit and have a coughing fit"

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

This infidel doesn't believe in Godbear.

Or maybe I'm just being a histrionic faggot.

We call them "pussies."

"Testosterone-based people."

 

[Honka Honka Burning Love]

Old People are great Suicide Bombers

From our Dear Leader

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

Remember, Toriyama had Roshi become stronger than ss2 Cell solely by using a cat to masturbate for a week, so anything can happen.

 

[Gas Station Boner Pills]

Gay sex in India would probably be a very shitty affair

 

[Grog]

"You shipped me with that Snorlax"

 

[DrNow]

There was this other chick who reminded me strongly of Joshua Moon. Got the same "soft eyes" that were really beautiful. Catch? She was FAAAAAT.

 

[On a Journey]

Choice ugojesse (Nigerian Instagram cartoonist) quotes, the images they're from can be found here:

It’s been over a year since any of Jesse’s art has been posted here, so I went through his account screenshotting the stuff I found funny or interesting.

Mommy what's the best prayer point?
When ever you want to pray just say "may Nigeria never happen to me"


If guy man dey tell you sey' he likes big yansh (ass) please try & confirm if it is male or female big yansh, things re happening


If them born your papa, try snatch ballot box this election


From his comments:
"I am Igbo and I Love Igbo girls, I can't marry outside my tribe and I am not tribalistic"

 

[Aunt Carol]

Women have big cute eyes so they can go uwu. Female faces are built accordingly.

 

[Pedophobe]

Then again, no normal person has a Kiwi Farms thread.

I was wrong about him getting better, I don't know why I ever thought that

Occam's razor says the simplest explanation, elaborate deliberate conspiracies and complex multi-stage plans, are the most true and honest.

 

[Forgetful Kiwi]

Is there a way to delete a kiwifarms profile?

 

[Gentlebastard]

When it comes to my dick, I'll take shriveled naturally over shriveled by misapplication of industrial caulking agents any day of the week.

It's like the Ouroboros, but instead of a snake eating its own tail it's a guy eating his own dick.

What kind of an unholy prompt are you feeding the AI to get such an accurate picture of his retarded hairstyle?

The sex offender registry is stupid. We should just kill pedos.

Hate crimed by his own mind. Pathetic.

Basically, I'm saying Pat is a lightly-closeted gay man pretending to be deeply-closeted gay man.

It's okay to kill civilians because civilians can embarrass you on Twitter

>content warning for less than a minute of 3 words being stated by a crowd

Is it just me or they are advocating to bomb shitposters and people they don't like on the internet?

Woops, my bad. I withdraw my smug emoji.

It's immoral to try and show me ads and if I had the power to physically mail every advertiser shit caked firecrackers, I would.

That would be beautiful irony if the future gets that bleak.

Do people frequently go out in public and hang giant banners on the highway while pretending to be the Sinaloa cartel? Sounds like a high-risk prank

The war on drugs led by drug lords

Sometimes I love this clown world

To be fair, I was top of my class at San Juan college and with honors for top Subway Sandwiches gifted program.

Hopefully one day I can own a mule in ojo.

Some genocides are just less genocide-y than others!

Not only is it "moral" to block ads, I would even consider it "a righteous duty".

Can't beat a nice bucket of fried chicken to go with that Salisbury steak and mashed potatoes when you're recovering from a stroke.

It's genuinely a "This is the moment I am most ashamed of" moment, like when Jimmy Carter shot a cat. For these guys, it's Tuesday.

She looks like some kind of Japanese Yokai, the spirit of an old woman who died hunting and pecking at her keyboard while trying to make a facebook post to her grandkids.

Now her spirit wanders households wearing the keyboard she died with as a hat, scaring children she comes across by appearing suddenly and asking whether she should've clicked "yes" on an internet popup about cleaning her computer for free.

Dear lord i hope this is just a retard ranting on the internet

"I did not have sexual relations with that fossil!"

Y'know, a covert demonic invasion of this mortal coil would explain a lot.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

Sometimes we put a Santa hat on him for Christmas.

 

[Skitarii]

I am not the one who has the viewpoints, worldview and posting style of a boomer. Sorry that the truth triggers you rapefugees so much