random_text.txt

[Guns of the Gaytriots]

Can't believe none of you archived his dick pics smh. Some kiwis you are!

 

[Gog & Magog]

I have womb envy. My biggest desire in life is to be able to gestate, deliver and breastfeed a full litter of kittens.

 

[SCV]

Enjoy Sanctions Retard Child.

 

[Tablet County]

"OMG I'm like, so bored at this checkout line! Anyways, that whole "rape thing" is like, so yesterday, it's not a big deal! All the haters are bringing me down, might kys later. Okay, the line is freed up, toodles! "

In this day and age, a Ben Hur remake would be called Nig Hur.

 

[Sawamura Simp]

Edit: I wouldn’t have gotten ninja’d by @Useful_Mistake if I hadn’t fought auto correct to say nigger a bunch

You're clearly a dogfucking pervert in your spare time, but I agree with you on this.

Yeah. He told the appeals team he was Indian and they immediately unbanned him.

Crazy as it sounds, coping to the point of creating alternate personas is not out of the question.

Total Galactic Conquest was achieved but lessons were learned about how this is not a sustainable way to go about things.

Spoiler: Bonus

Loony Tunes were sold out to Niggerdom 30 years ago. It's a valid debate that furry culture is an improvement.

 

[glass_houses]

Bandana to cover balding? Check. Balding greasy hair? Check. Horribly mismatched leggings/gym shorts (?) combo? Check. Gaudy striped socks? Check. Vaguely kinky rubber hooker boots? Check. Slight autogynesmile? Check! Ding Ding Ding! We have a weiner!

 

[Free Dick Pills]

'SOMEBODY GET ME HARD RIGHT NOW' - ethan ralph, on the anniversary of Sandra's death

 

[Aunt Carol]

Take consolation that at least you can feel your dick.

Like if the minotaur of Crete demanded sacrifices of weird potato men to be thrown into the labyrinth to simulate copulation with.

 

[ComStar]

"2,000 miners will be in Winnemucca from 2025-2027.
They will need a form of entertainment"

Russell Greer on why Winnemucca absolutely needs a whorehouse ASAP

 

[stupid frog]

Imagine lying crumpled on asphalt, bleeding out, trying and failing to look down because you don't realize your neck is broken, and the last thing you hear as the sting of blood forces you to shut your eyes forever is WHOOOOAAAA BUDDY *dingalingalingaling*

HE'S DENTED! HE'S T-BONED! HE'S FUCKING DEAD!

RETARD ALERT!!
RETARD ALERT!!
RETARD ALERT!!

 

[Aero the Alcoholic Bat]

To stay firmly on topic. I fucking hate autistic people. That is why.

 

[The Taco Santo!]

You work at Starbucks, you don't have dignity.

 

[Fuck Fags I'm A Homophobe]

MMMM MUZZIE CUM. I LOVE TURKROACH SEMEN. MAKE AMERICA MUSLIM AGAIN INSHALLAH.

Using a lemon for deodorant sounds like hygiene advice from Hannibal Lecter. Did you know butter is excellent for the skin? You'll brown right up.

 

[Onni Kalsarikännit]

imagine if spongebob isnt real and he doesnt live in a pineapple under the sea.

 

[babadook]

She looks like Vanilla Ice's younger special needs brother circa the early 1990s whose group home is about to be foreclosed, forcing Vanilla Ice and his black best friend to enter an incongruously white underground rap competition in order raise the funds to save it from the machinations of some shady real estate developer and his own crack band of rap ninjas

 

[Gentlebastard]

tl;dr: Furries are laying out exactly how they were groomed, but framing it as if it's their anime protagonist origin story leading up to the unfortunate poop pool arc. What a world.

Is it wrong of me to hope sigmoid colon vaginoplasties become standard vaginoplasties because the idea of troons being identifiable by a vaguely fecal odor wafting from them is funny? Because if it is, I don't want to be right.

How have I not read this before? This is an artisanal shitpost.

You're gonna have to troon out to avoid this debacle.

this guy has to be fucking with us right???

I say that mainly because this post is really funny because of how it goes from hilarity to horror then sadness in a single post.

you wage war on the concept of intelligence and personal hygeine

*whispers* Have you heard about about piss milking, friend?

best proof I have that we dont live in a simulation is some autistic would have figured out how to use it to mine bitcoin

His obsession with hard boiled eggs makes me think the farts are unreal in that house.

I guess my joke didn't land and you genuinely think I was advocating for being a Nieztchean Ubermensch in this, the designated shitting thread.

IF YOU ARE AROUSED BY ANOTHER HUMAN'S GENITALS YOU ARE NOT ASEXUAL what the fuck is with these people so desperately clinging to their sooper speshul labels man

 

[Aero the Alcoholic Bat]

I don't mean to sound like a Diddy ass nigga, but girls with backpacks are hot

 

[Tingle]

speaking of The Hills have Eyes oh by golly do those eyes have some fucking hills.

 

[indomitable snowman]

Bald people genocide, Our people are being destroyed. We must secure the existence of our people and the future of bald children.

You will take my tasteful Norwood 3 from my cold dead hands.

Sneedgro should be a new word.

 

[Dr. Butt]

Pray for AIDS.