random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Sinner's Sandwich]

There are witches sending energy to Ukraine and casting innumerable hexes on Putin's penis as we speak

 

[Meat Target]

Well…you see….sneed was selling feed and seed….

They're only taking him prisoner because he's wearing Puma instead of Adidas.

They are fighting for their country and you are shitposting on a tranny fetishist board.

I thought Slavic video games were chugging raw corn likker and hooking their nuts up to car batteries for shits and giggles tbh

 

[PhoBingas]

Personally I think NATO should tell the president of Belarus, decide how your name is spelled, is it Lukashenko or Lukashenka, make up your damn mind or we nuke Minsk

 

[Blackhole]

The Best You'll Every Taste!

You know who Scalfani is? He's the guy in those trashy cookware commercials who fucks up simple stuff before they introduce the gimmicky product.

Jack Scalfani is very unattractive and I would not eat his cooking.

“Ohhhh it’s soooo weeet” and “I can’t believe how wetttttt that is” are not words I want to hear come out of Jack Scalfani’s mouth.

Jack seems like the type of nigga that would scoop a serving size spoonful (or 5) of mayo out the fridge at night and eat it.

jack and his family are pretty much every stereotype non-americans hold of americans

how the hell is MEATER not a gay dating app

The best embalming fluids you'll ever taste.

the scalfanis are every bad american stereotype rolled into a single family

Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn't last very long if you're fat.

When you're some kind of minority, everything negative that happens to you is obviously because you're part of that minority, and not because you're incompetent.

She will be performing the ritual execution of President Zelensky by crushing his skull with spiked high heels in 1440p VR

eighteen naked cowlions at ram ranch

If you really think about it hard Putin is basically Voldemort and the Russian Army is the Death Eaters and Zelenskyy is Harry Potter and the US Marine Core is the Order of the Phoenix and the UN is Katniss from the Hunger Games and the Ukrainian Army is the Avengers and Joseph Biden is Iron Man and the EU is Keanu Reeves.

 

[Aunt Carol]

I see this cretin pop up everywhere, so it's pleasant to confirm he looks like a goblin.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

SECOND wife, his first wife was a famous furry artist called Spazzy Koneko who cheated on him a ton.

My life goal is to never end up here

Am I the only one?

 

[Big Nasty]

 

[Meat Target]

How much damage did the exploding chats cause?

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

Nah nigger, if i end up in a situation where a flip is inevitable im cranking up the go pro and timing a well placed 'i hate niggers' bomb

Hopefully some kind soul will find the footage and upload it

That said i really dont wanna die lol

 

[CobraPlissken]

I know a wound care nurse who would not ever want to touch that and she loves wound care.

Otoh....bro, your teeth match your beige hat. At the very least, color coordinate so as to not highlight how greige your chiclets are.

He just opens his mouth and lets the wind blow his tongue around.

 

[Mr Bunny]

One whore can easily handle 5 combatants at once; 6 if one of them has a foot fetish.

 

[KiwiFuzz]

God is a colonializer, a cop, and a white supremacist

 

[Blackhole]

I'm an armchair Marshal you grabasstic piece of amphibian shit and if you disrespect my rank again I will PT you until you fucking DIE

No, guys, you don't understand. My middling understanding of Eastern European politics and possession of a Twitter account give me unclouded and precise knowledge about how many vodkaniggers on either side have been killed.

Nonsense. It's the fault of Gamergate, white privilege, and most of all, the horrible transphobia of J.K. Rowling.

The Farters of Kharkiv. The Sharters of Novi Buh. The Buck Breaker of Rozivka. The Ass Fucker of Kherson.

 

[Meat Target]

Sam is immortal. In the future, people will study him like historians and archaeologists today study Pompeii.

"Class next we are going to talk about historic problems with American gun control. One man was able to commit 13 different school shootings."

This has to be a parody.
I need this to be a parody.

Cool it with the Islamic remarks you glowing motherfucker.

All that makeup, plastic surgery, and convenient lighting, and yet I can immediately tell it's a man

How big is his dick?
This is a very important question.

 

[Lunete]

Oh look it is stupid. Look fuck nuts You are a noob you have no clue what you are talking about. You know I wish we still had the dark web.
I would love to access the back web once again and ban you from the internet for good. And once done you would never gain access ever again.
Then as many had found out daddy came home found out you got his physical address banned and beat you nearly to death.

It was wonderful being an MSN level 4 admin back in the old days

 

[KiwiFuzz]

For the Faroese, it's a prime whaling location.

Never invite a vampire into your house, you silly boy.

 

[Meat Target]

Groypers are walking attention starved little personality disorders

When one skips our meds we all
skip our meds

The serotonin storm is coming

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

I was Wondering how long it’d take for RWBY and RT to touch the Ukraine crisis.

woof. how tone deaf can people get?

fuck. I want to be sponsored by Raid Shadow Legends. I’ll even wear it on a Tech Wear Shirt

 

[Blackhole]

Other pedos out there playing tic-tac-toe while Tommy boy out there playing quasidimensional chess

 

[Haffhart]

Not really much of a point when they're the same retards that go on Twitter because they're mad someone misgendered a box of Trscuits.