random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Hitman One]

God, I wish someone would FINALLY get it right and minecraft an an*me convention.

 

[Open Window Maniac]

I would shoot up a place too if I didn't have any TF2 unusual hats

 

[Enterhater42069]

WE DEM STEPFORD NIGGAZ

USA Today is like the Kim Kardashian ass of the news industry.

The jannies won. ;_;

But what will doomers do when they can't doom post?

Spose there is always the rope

Jannies are trannies
Stop using reddit

Reddit cucking under pressure? Must be a day ending in “y”!

Buzz Lightyear is back, baby! And this time? He fucks!

I hope you get brutally fucking murdered. Head in the microwave, tits on the ktichen table, vulva nailed to your mailbox brutal.

He’s not even an Asian XX chromosome woman what is this author talking about

Based and Transpilled

Must make the dykes say yikes when they see these True and Honest gals on the apps

Wow, five whole weeks without diddling kids! You've certainly proven yourself to be a changed man!

Hahahahahahahaha How The Fuck Is Cyber Bullying Real Hahahaha Nigga Just Walk Away From The Screen Like Nigga Close Your Eyes Haha

Suffer not the furry to live.

Guys stop harassing me. Sure I once murdered women. I once ate dead moms. I am better now.

Sorry dude you've been CANCELLED! *does cool guitar riff*

Not only are you a pedo but you're a pedo with a god-ugly fursona how must it feel lmfao

Once a pedo, always a pedo.

Speedrun your suicide you nonce.

Was the banny janny in fact a tranny?

They/them? You're a human being, not some hivemind space creature. They're not going to school with fucking Legion.

Unironically thanks Obama you useless fucking nigger.

 

[Gas Station Boner Pills]

Some white girls even fuck niggers, which is also beastiality.

 

[Law]

Because there isn't canonical sexual intercourse in Transformers, there are at least two different philosophical factions among Transformers fans based on how they believe the Transformers have sex:

This post gave me brain damage.

 

[Dolomite]

"From the high fructose corn syrup you came, and to the high fructose corn syrup you return."

 

[Chi-com Soldier]

We really need to start regulating women like firearms

 

[I am vomit]

Months ago he blames Randy Marsh for porking a pangolin, now it's a man with down syndrome from california

 

[Local Fed]

Their incompetence of the English language turned what should have been a 5 minute call into a 30 minute exercise in frustration and wanting to nuke India.

Swear to god if I have to use shortwave to listen to MATI it will be a new low point in my life.

DSP Tries it: Abortion

The only time I've ever seen him not filled with absolute racial hatred of the negro was when he first beheld the Death Camps, he wept at the beauty of them. I once cleared my throat and he took out his Hitler Youth knife; and carved the word 'race traitor' into my forehead because the noise sounded too Arabic to him.

I don't have a perfume suggestion, but I would recommend not listening to anyone with an anime avatar when it comes to smelling nice. These people want to sniff seats.

Please spoiler your interracial sex scene. Thanks

 

[Larry David's Opera Cape]

I can’t imagine what happens if Ben gets a date to go further than 3rd base. They go back to his shed and then what? Ben pulls out the giant pale wyrm-dick and expects the girl to act like it’s totally normal? “Oh wow it’s so big… and floppy… and featureless”

 

[Meat Target]

Proceed with caution, subject is armed and retarded

 

[TFT-A9]

"there's already horse cum all over everything, fuck it".

 

[Sylvie Paula Paula]

Heather was at one point a community leader in breastfeeding

 

[Useful_Mistake]

If they already commit Beastiality then fucking niggers won't be so bad.

I'm much more concerned about them fucking niggers. At least there won't be any human x Alsatian hybrids, unlike all the niglets out there.

 

[CorteXY]

..But they're all fucked up, who knows. I'm still surprised he fucked Barb before a dog.

 

[Sparkling Yuzu]

I fully believe he deserves the electric chair. Zap zap to the extreme, and may God have mercy on his soul.

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

If I went back in time and told people that in 2022, mothers would be more worried about their daughter dating a religious, community-involved young man who probably also believes in waiting until marriage to have sex than they would be if their daughter was dating a man in a dress, they would literally weep.

I literally showed you that I used "the future is now old man" before you ever did, using your post history.

 

[Open Window Maniac]

School just gets in the way of tranny mandated discord grooming sessions and Minecraft streams

 

[mr.moon1488]

You will never be an alien. You have no green blood. You have no natural, spindly arms and legs. You have no thirst for knowledge that can only be sated by anal probing. You are not what they found in Area 51. You will one day kill yourself, and will be buried with your human name, and not with Quoodlik'Cobntra, your chosen alien name.

 

[Blackhole]

A lawyer is a hypocrite who will say and do anything for money? I am SHOCKED by this revelation. Next you'll tell me that schnoz of his isn't a coincidence.

I hear every detail down to his jowels flapping and his pants filling with shit.

I am the Retard. I speak for the trees. I speak for the trees, for the trees have no OH MY FUCKING SHIT I'M ON FIRE I'M BURNING UP!!!!! AAAAUUUGGGHHH!!!!!

Imagine being trolled by a plant.