random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Tablet County]

From the creators of mattress slut and couch cuck, we bring you: niggachair.
Rated hard R.

Isn't The Color Purple like 40 years old now? Is there a remake or something?

remake

they ruined another classic by sticking in a bunch of niggers

 

[frozen_runner]

The elites don't want you to know this but breathing in the Steam Deck Stank is how you open your third eye and find the way past the great ice wall that encompasses our flat earth and meet God.

Thank you. Fuck faggots.

Taylor Swift stops existing when you drink non-fluoridated water.

From the creators of mattress slut and couch cuck, we bring you: niggachair.
Rated hard R.

I didn't know that some dudes had a stimming fetish, but I guess someone has to cater to it.

 

[Archie_Kimkicker]

I’m to the right of Mussolini and I own a Tesla. Jack is just a moron.

 

[Standardized Profile]

Sobbing, I paced around my house and yelled, “I don’t have a personality disorder!”

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/im-an-autistic-sex-worker-and-heres-why-it-works-for-me.179269/

 

[Hitman One]

Premium subscriptions included the option of a “free castration performed by the EunuchMaker.”

 

[Cybertonia]

My mother was, for many years, a non-internet user. She didn't learn that some guys were attracted to feet until her 60s. Meanwhile I saw my first barfcock at the age of 11.

 

[ForTheHoard]

This morning, I was crying over a queer kid in India.

Jackie Singh

 

[Gentlebastard]

If you go to the ER and tell them you lost a tampon you’ll get fingerbanged and your insurance will pay for it

It's amazing to see how far chess has progressed. I remember when chess players were limited to adjusting their cock and balls as a means of communicating with their team.

How many bits of information per minute a human being can send via voluntary contractions of the anal sphincter?

This is the second time I've heard of an anal beads cheating incident in the professional chess scene. I have no other recourse but to consider chess to be for faggots.

I thought shitting where you're not supposed to was a Chinese pastime.

I dislike people who commit suicide like that. You are ruining people's day and fucking up infrastructure. Park the car and jump, and do it in the middle of the night so you don't cause a traffic jam.

I feel like there's a decent chance a bunch of them eventually commit Jonestown style ritual suicide to avoid catching a cold and that will be funny.

We are simultaneously everything he has ever wanted, and also exactly what he fuckin deserves

Is it even possible for a straight man to bend his wrist this far? Go on, try it. I think it needs some really feminine genes to be so limp wristed.

Since when is political science "science"?

He claims to not be in the closet, yet this photo looks like he has a ravenous hunger for cock.

We're not a true crime podcast, we're not crusaders for truth and justice, we're not (spit) journalists, we're not cops or lawyers. We're here to laugh and have a good time.

“How did you come to love having a girl dick?” “Lots of troon pornography.” It really is annoying when stuff the religious right warned us about decades ago ends up being right, coomers really are pathetic creatures.

The inevitable has happened: We’ve entered bitch eating crackers territory.

how about we just laugh at the dumb fat guy and shitpost about him?

The Redditor should be rounded up and gassed.

"The entire country of Ukraine were secretly Russian bots the whole time"

Look at this thing. This fat depressing mistake of a man. Look at him and be glad you aren't him

 

[AgendaPoster]

I know your belief that "the age of consent should be 14" isn't relevant to the thread topic, however I cannot help but be disgusted every time I see you.

 

[Al from Dadeville]

You can keep my abayas and give them to your next bitch

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

No, and if you don't go back in time and abort my mom I will go back and beat her to death as a newborn myself.

 

[Kawaii Supremacy]

"100% community funded"

Inspired by a MATI stream where someone said you don't get any money from your forum.

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

I accidentally walked into a black barbershop in [REDACTED CITY] and got the best haircut of my life. Also they're not shy using the bay rum. I think it actually got me laid, they could detect the African pheromones that got transferred.

 

[Tablet County]

I saw a nigger once at the gas station, probably a year or two back. I was expecting to get mugged or something but it didn't happen. Nothing happened, surprisingly. He just bought a pack of Newports and left. I'll always remember that day.

 

[No Memory]

This is one of the saddest things I've ever seen.
*unzips pants*

 

[Gentlebastard]

Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the Lord God had made. He said to the troon, “Did God really say, ‘You must not cut off your balls’?”

There are no yaoi paddles on ebay. Where did they all end up?

Sorry for my verbal diarrhoea, just mad at the internet again.

I was never too keen on learning the deepest intricacies of flaying your genitals and shoving a plastic rod inside the wound, so I could be wrong.

the dude is an absolute nutter whose trainwreck of a life keeps finding new stations to crash into

I am in complete agreement with Josh's analysis of Low Tier God: he's black.

All the bragging, muh dicking, overt homosexuality, insanely fragile ego and consequent chimp outs are exactly the same way every other nigger acts. Being amazed by LTG is like watching in amazement as a white man regularly goes to work or comes home to his wife and children after a short trip to the convenience store.

Fatrick is a better cow.
He’s got so many layers of fat that every time you think you’ve reached the bottom, there’s another layer fat to make you laugh.

Every time I log in, I can come to the thread and he's being an idiot in a new and interesting way that he has not been before.

 

[Gog & Magog]

Also, I'm a pedophile like all the others. Not gonna dart around it. Don't really care.

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

Yet another smirking sentient cluster of paraphilias in a dress targeting children?

 

[Black Man Underwear]

No I am a literal, doctor diagnosed sped and crazy person

Disembowel it and strangle everyone responsible with its entrails.

Where is infanticide legal? Going shopping there sounds a lot more enjoyable

i find it funny a lesbian is so concerned about abortion like nigga how you gonna get pregnant

 

[RACISM]

Everyone hates niggers, you're not special.