random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[vomitusdeux]

It isn't forward or foreward. It isn't foreskin.

He's also extremely short, out of breath and wobbles back and forth like Chantal. This guy is a deathfat midget hobo.

Better to be an animal than a haggisnigger.

Why can't I get a fuckable monster?!?
WTF am I supposed to do with that furry shit?
Other than that, very good Muslim representation.

Getting paid to look at a bunch of soyboy penises is almost as bad as actually putting them in your mouth.

Fuck, if this bothers bongs so much I’m not surprised that tooth brushing is problematic.

it's like sharks when they get the taste for human blood. he'll never be satisfied with dog pussy.

your solution to handling mental illness involves turning your crotches into rejected Arby's meat crafts and encouraging children to do the same

In exchange for having people internationally watching me masturbate. I'd say it's an OKish deal.

This looks like something that would only be consumed by an autistic kid with celiac disease.

I’m a weeb, do you expect me to feel shame???

I haven't brushed up on my Martin Luther, but did his denouncement of the Catholic church include a treatise about incest porn and statutory rape?

it is all funny until you get doxxed by the hacker know as Kiwi farms because power leveling

I once told him I think it's attractive when men smoke. He then started smoking and started sending me selfies of himself with lit cigarettes in his mouth. I know he didn't smoke before because he called them "cancer sticks" but now he was posing with packs of Camels in every picture.

it’s also a terrible idea to change your avatar to match a school shooter less than a week after the shooting occurred, not because it’s offensive but because it probably helped to attract a lot of unwanted attention and give someone sufficient motive to google your name

I carried this thread like Sisyphus.

This is how you get hummus to pogchamp Mossad's bunghole.

I'm pretty sure that's the plot to any number of 80's horror movies. Although with less lolcows.

I chose to stare straight at the eclipse today because I decided that if I'm never going to see a new episode of MATI, I'd rather never see anything ever again.

Gamers love big hard throbbing children's card games

This is a BulgARYAN win. Suck my aryan balls

 

[BirdUp]

He looked like Walter White with hair.

 

[DoNotFeedTheSneed]

I didn't defend any pedos. I said if I was a 13 or 14 year old I would fuck a 22yr old girl.

I was literally banned for being a straight white male.

People wonder why faggotry is on the rise.

You talk about how teenage boys are horny and want to fuck and you get banned.

I am going to start my own hashtag.

#NightCrawlerdidnothingwrong and #FreeNightCrawler

 

[Tablet County]

@bird.up Do I spy me an excerpt from the literary masterpiece Born of Science: Jane the Killer?

 

[DoNotFeedTheSneed]

I never said I wanted to fuck my own family.

 

[Black Man Underwear]

@Pilgrim of Grace

You told me.i can't be southern AND gothic.
That's what you think trole

 

[assigned Karen at birth]

the reason that men are so obsessed with the word cuck and everything being "cucking" and "cucked" is because they know deep inside almost all of them are cucks. It's not the porn that is making them cucks, it's that they were born cucks and therefore desire porn. They don't seek out women to fuck because that's something for alpha-scrotes to do, while the beta-scrote and his dysgenic, inferior seed instinctively knows that he is only supposed to sit and watch as the alpha fulfills his biological purpose.

 

[Tablet County]

In 100% of cases, you are retarded.

Timothy W. Soyjack is the co-founder and director of the Institute for Hitler Justice and Reconciliation in The HItler.

I follow you so I can actively ignore each one of your new posts. You got THAT? I’m IGNORING YOU. Each new post reminds me how much I’m ignoring you.

VGH... I MVDE GERMANV BIGGER IN HOI4... WHVT COVLD HAVE BEEN...

 

[Aunt Carol]

"Parents got killed by goblins" is to elves what "parents got laid off during covid" is to 2010s babies.

I will never hit peak elf. Fantasy is for girls. Get off our unicorn lawn. Fight me. I am a powerful elf witch princess assassin and very tall. I play Dark Eldar.

that wasn't me. I was just curious about retarded babies.

 

[Bill Evans 45]

Chris himself once stated that he felt more comfortable around elderly people.

 

[demicolon]

I just went to a local tree event, lesbians liking trees and nature is a thing right?

 

[Meat Target]

It really seems like these niggers are playing some kind of RPG where the Kike Reaper is set to arrive 1/1/2030 and the only way to appease Him is to fulfil all his pod and child castrations related demands before then no matter what.

 

[Gentlebastard]

...actually I would just go straight to fucking his ass if i'm honest. Not really a serenading kind of guy

He stumbled across a bonafide kindred spirit and spat in his fucking face within seconds of seeing him.....christ this is beautiful

In fairness it was my fault going to fucking Reddit of all places

Every time I feel a pang of empathy for him, I remember what total and complete asshole he is with 0 redeeming qualities.

And this is how the Tranch dies. Not with Waco 2.0, but with backstabbing, grifting, and a whimper.

It makes me sad. No matter how fucked up life got I could always look at the tranch and say "at least im not them". It's the end of an era.

It's still socially unacceptable to play "kick the retard," at least in public.

he's entirely right but he just worded it as retarded as humanly possible which is no surprise

I wonder about the cognitive dissonance that makes someone who drinks piss for fetish videos unable to understand that normal women don't want you in their bathroom.

I don’t want him in the same city as me, let alone bathroom.

Does Colorado have one of those laws where you have to inform the buyer if a murder took place in a house before it can close?

He's going to turn that barren land into a building that hosts the Kiwi infrastructure, protected from troons by the souls of hundreds of dead alpacas.

yt ppl don't season they laundry

Great find 10/10 would torture my loved ones with this.

I'm getting too mad, let's see what YouTube recommends.
I think this website wants me to commit several hate crimes.

Imagine the poor troon running with a raging boner all the way to the sleepover, because he watched too much porn and thought it would be 33% makeup, 33% talking about guys and sex and 33% hot, lesbian sex.

He looks like a fag, walks like a fag, acts like a fag and talks like a fag. His posturing is pathetic. He couldn't come across as any more of an effeminate homosexual without publicly sucking cocks every waking moment.

I love how he thought taking a picture of himself sucking a semen-like substance through a straw was somehow a good move to prove his extreme masculinity.

 

[Tablet County]

#GamerGate2 has OFFICIALLY signed the bloodpact with the Gnome King of the Hollow Earth

Hitler, eh? I'll have two, please.

We just shit in a corner and then wingardium leviosa it away, retard.

BATHROOMS IN CAGES, BATHROOMS IN CAGES

Despite all my rage
the school makes me shit in a cage

I feel like give you a good beating

cell door clangs shut
"Hey man what are you in for?"
"Oh, I'm just here to take a shit."

 

[Miriam Margoyles]

How boring… If I had a fantasy about fucking a nigger, I’d go for the real deal and not someone in a mask.

 

[George Lucas]

Be responsible?! Fuck that. I'd rather murder babies then act responsible for my own actions.

-woman apparently

how about a dildo shaped like an elephant since yall are simps for the Republican Party. Maybe make it tusked, too for a more penetrating experience.

 

[Thomas Eugene Paris]

Nope sorry I don’t care how many IEDs blew up your friends in the desert, it’s not my problem. If I have to choose between a small number of men coming home from The War and eating a bullet to escape their trauma OR having to deal with the jumpscare of opening the ladies’ bathroom door in a Target to discover them visibly erect while taking bathroom selfies? Enjoy your Vitamin Pb, apply directly to forehead!

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

Ghosted by your pretend internet boyfriend? That's a groomin'.

 

[Tablet County]

@Blasterman was the first one. He DM'd me, confessed, got drunk, and @Muttley (RIP) sorta doxed him and learned he's a Czech who takes part in furry meet-ups (homosexual orgies.) It was fun.

Clearly they all wanted their slutty flavor aid and they're gay if they didn't like it.

 

[RA-5C Vigilante]

Aryan Brotherhood is being reworked now