random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[KiwiFuzz]

Seriously, this pandering of black tranny hookers, chicks that don't even look male getting their tits chopped off, eating disorders, butchers that are called surgeons, basically trying to coerce a straight guy into getting raped by a huge black dude with implants.

A Florida Sheriff is always a good presser
like when he explained how he talked to Pikachu and Pikachu turned state's evidence on the dude

 

[JJLiautaud]

He HAD to do porn in his living room (making 4 dollars an evening) in order to survive. He went from "high-yield hedge fund management" to autosodomy, it's really the only career path he's trained for!

 

[seri0us]

How about I piss in your mouth and you shut the fuck up

 

[keyboredsm4shthe2nd]

When you pinch Wendy's pussy they pinch back

How does a cup of Alpo even translate into square feet of farmland? Like, if Rover gets a snack is there now a hole in the ground in Iowa?

And this is why you don't feed the local wildlife, no matter how "cute" they may seem. You brought this onto yourself, granny.

Their blood is on your hands lentil-eaters.

I’m only fat because I eat a cookie every time you derail this fucking thread.

 

[KiwiFuzz]

When I was 3 I sat in front of cartoon crossdressing, shooting, taunting, implied suicide, abuse of the retarded and those seen as "different", abuse of alcohol, glorification of the Puerto Rican culture, and yes even stabbing (hey, Tom couldn't have turned into an umbrella without some sort of pre-penetration) and I turned out fine!

 

[Poppavalyim Andropoff]

This guy is so far in the closet that he found Narnia and then proceeded to let everyone there fuck his wife so he could get some dick

 

[RedRocket69]

This recent quote from Tommy Tooter is bretty gud.

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/attn-j...-directors-of-lolcow-llc.108311/post-10768497

 

[naaaaiiiiillllll!!!]

There are a lot of retarded retards spewing retardation

Preach brotha!

 

[Meat Target]

No, if the weebs want to get beheaded they're just going to have to get a job and construct a homemade guillotine like normal respectable folk.

 

[ScooterL]

His beard with its sharp angles looks like a train plow
But, ironically, he isn't the one doing the plowing

 

[Aunt Carol]

Okay, that doesn't negate the fact that a shark could eviscerate a human if given the chance.

this makes sense in context, but I would like to use it in every unrelated argument I have

 

[Autistic Joe]

I've read The Prince and Art of War by Machiavelli and I can safely state that the opening to both is Machiavelli telling the reader to shove a dildo in their ass on camera and then be cucked by their wife as it breeds true apex energy.

He may have founded this club of his entirely for his love of cock. The glint in his eyes makes it look like his entire life has lead up to this moment. It's like his fucking wedding night and he is the bride.

 

[Jack Awful]

On the process of writing that i realized how fucking damaged i am.

 

[KiwiFuzz]

I would stand there flushing tampons until the school flooded.

 

[CatParty]

lobot was genderqueer and neuro divergent, his headset was actually there to stop his otherwise near constant masturbation

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

I could see things like dungeon masters getting capped over bad dice rolls during D&D games in the back of crack houses.

You can take the thug out of the ghetto but you can't take the ghetto out of the thug.

 

[KiwiFuzz]

Who needs burrito places when you can pop over to your friendly neighbourhood transwomyn owned collective for burrito night?

ILL LIVE INNA WOODS WITH MY FIFTEEN BUTTBUDDIES AND GUNS AND YOU SHALL SEE.

 

[Hitman One]

Don't forget rape!

 

[Ellesse_warrior]

Oh yeah stephanie lets see you make gravy lets see you make gravy chef gordon ramsey!!!

This was a quote from a King Cobra rant

 

[Wintersun]

after reading the Wikipedia page on uwu, the most common place people go is United States war crimes