random_text.txt

[Seafarer]

A thread about a school shooting devolves into an autistic debate over whether a deceased 15 year old murderer is fuckable. Peak A&H.

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

"proud Dog mom, body positive but 6'1+ males only, my kids love kfc"

Fucking adult The Loud House fans are almost 100% pedophiles

But then again I am a fucking autist so it's impossible to say if this wrekt me.

 

[Dr. Butt]

I am so glad that the leader of the fourth reich is Jewish!

 

[fitty tucker]

In the words of a "transmasc demiandrogyne enby" redditor who experienced gender euphoria while using the men's room...

Urinal cakes are not used for wiping. How I have not gotten an infection is beyond me.

 

[Drip Torch]

I actually used WordPerfect works 1.0 for dos to hook up the first time. Mindbomb BBS in Janesville running on some dudes Atari.

 

[Agent Abe Caprine]

Masochism is better than sadism. Builds character.

Today, I learned not not look up the word butt on Bluesky. Too much Islamic Content to even post here. It dwarfs the Furry shit.

I expected skateboarding banana peppers or some shit what is this thread even

Wrong. Gays just want emo bussy.

I looked up Captain Underpants and got some weird hits, but nothing about conspiracies -- do you remember anything else?

Canadians, DM me for techniques on how to warm up your cold penises.

What if people landed on outermost major moon of that big gas giant? Outside of the severe radiation area, but temp is -139.2°C / -218.47°F. How would that impact the dong?

A broken clock is right twice a day. It's astonishing how the trans furry meth head is one of the few people to have a reasonable take on this debacle.

I'm watching someone slowly transform into Tommy Tooter

Okay but hear me out though - I've read thousands upon thousands of books, watched hundreds of films, been a patron of live theater and orchestra and opera for nearly thirty years, and one day I sincerely hope that I can stop lying about having watched Babylon 5.

although it's doubtful that Hawaiians that witnessed Pearl Harbor first hand would be still alive today, and also interested in making NTR or pornographic material in general

I remember being in school and some girls would talk about the Schwan's Guy. I kept hearing schwanz guy.

I think the distinction was unimportant because they sounded like they had a crush on him.

I refuse to believe everyone wanting to see Destiny suck dick killed this site faster than sadistic trannies

What does the site crashing have to do with destiny sucking dick?

The site database got corrupted because so many people were downloading a video of Destiny going to town on some dude's benis.

It's entirely possible to bang hookers without any sort of consequence

Bring back the insane lesbian sex cult.

I’ve calmed down now. Antarctica makes me very passionate.

Did you crib that line from your group gooning DMs?

he was NOT ROCKING THE SOLID SNAKE GUN FUCK OFF GO DIE

does it really matter if he was jackin it to furry porn 24/7 with a hitler body pillow at his side?

How’s a nigga going to be Gen Z, buff AF, and not be bisexual.

The one advantage of dying on the toilet is that you won’t shit/piss your pants when you die.

oh boy is everyone schizophrenically hallucinating a tranny again?

Skill issue when i was 15 years old i already had killer ass

 

[Pedophobe]

Kiwi Farms is a lot of things, but organized isn't one of them.

 

[Lords Greatsword]

I don't hate Jews or anything. But Jews shouldn't rap. I want to hear rap songs about robbing banks, not about owning them.

 

[Larry David's Opera Cape]

This thread is going to become state evidence all because the guy won't STFU and go to bed like he said he would

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

Laserpig as a whole has made Europe seem like the gayest place known to man. Like you walk down the street and you'll see two men fucking raw dog. He has actively made me never want to go to Europe. It sounds like a place where you'll just get raped by crazy gay men at any time no matter what country you're in, and since you're in Europe, you can't even have a knife, so you just have to take the sodomy. I DONT WANT AIDS BRO!

I will be reading this thread to my children in 15 years as a bedtime story, it's got everything- comedy, tragedy, flawed/complex characters, men driven mad by their lust and rage, deceit, treachery, cute animals, ect.

Buck Angel? That nigga that married a dominatrix and she left him so that she could pump Larry Wachowski full of ketamine while he cums tied up? She took away his PlayStation too, real shame. I wonder how he's doing nowadays.

I'm going to cite the bible on this one. If you look carefully you can seen Santa (or satan if you rearranged the letters) actually is an agent of Israel and attacked the USS Liberty.

Santa’s the realest nigga I know, all my homies love Santa.

I'd happily throw him and the self proclaimed straight version of him called Tim Pool into the alpaca grave pit and promise whoever fights or fucks the other one to death a way out while I film it and go "say WHAAA" and "OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD" over it like those niggo reaction channels

 

[frozen_runner]

There, I solved Zardoz.

I myself had a boomer moment.

Anal Secrets was one of my favorite X-Files episodes

Think of it as a lamp but it's a shower.

I have questions.
Many questions.
I fear the answers.

As no one in this story was white, I have no interest

Buck Breaking is once again legal in the state of New York

Thank you, this provides me with answers to questions I never wanted to ask.

The Portuguese were horny bastards into buggery and slavery.

I use brave because I trusted null

Everything they do or will ever fucking do is shitty and queer. I wish they would just stop.

Merry Kristallinacht to everyone!

He seems sus, gay, and german.

What if the ayyys are space Jews and goy are monke?

 

[Aunt Carol]

It is 2024!! We have insulated leggings! Stop!!!!!

 

[like_shutup_&_drive_scoob]

It's a shame that the strung up plastic bag fence is obstructing the surrounding view, the garbage and dead camels that litters the landscape is quite nice this time of year.

I wish my penis was powerful enough to take down the Kiwi Farms.

INCONTROVERTIBLE FACTS:
-Steven can walk around in the average Polly Pocket playset without ducking

Bitch is such a tryhard. The only sports she's played is forehead wars.

The country ruled by 100 princes raised entirely by palace staff and harems of kidnapped women with fratricidal political violence and absolutely no future if the demand or supply of oil dries up for any reason? The country that is a rump state of the Arabian nation promised to them by the British in the first world war? Which was a nomadic tribe under the Ottoman boot for hundreds of years? The one ran by a fucking cult? The fucking inhospitable desert so food insecure the crowned prince will personally suck your cock if you figure out how to grow a single plant anywhere in their country?

Is this a Muslim I'm responding to? Do you worship a pedophile?

 

[Bruno Powroznik]

From the dansburst discord logs

[30/10/2023 05:04] dansman1729
if i'm not locked up i will ejaculate in public

 

[Counterfeit Obol]

GAY CROSSDRESSING NUKE ALIENS

 

[CallmeCicada]

all of this could have been avoided if only we banned europeans from the internet

 

[Gentlebastard]

Recall, search for "retarded nigger"

500,000 matches found for Kiwifarms

I found out over Thanksgiving that my sister in law is a patposter (she claims it's my fault) and that she in turn accidentally turned a bunch of her friends into patposters (this is also somehow my fault apparently).

2017 or 2035, it doesn't matter. He lives forever in the Groundhog Day Hellhole of his own creation. And it is beautiful.

I shall stand not for tomfoolery, shenanigans, hijinks, nor the slightest hint of skullduggery in this household.

Is there a British slang equivalent for "fat faggot with bitch tits"? Even better if it's that Cockney rhyming slang.

I think the Green Party needs a community watch thread. Not just Germany's, all of them.

Look at how his bitch tits are just starting to sprout in this pic.

I always wonder, why a piss fetish?

He's like some stupid fusion of one of those gay reaction YouTube channels and your nan asking you if you've ever heard of the YouTubes in the year of our lord 2024.

His gut and his man tits look like they are in a race to see which one can touch the ground first

In Stinkditch for thirty seconds and I'm already physically ill

 

[RuPaul’s Drag Racist]

Pooner wipes pussy with urinal cake, five months later learns that's not what they're for.

 

[AllieKat]

So, it was moids afterall who are responsible? You may apologize personally to me on my profile for being retarded and believing this person was a "radfem" when it was the penis-niggers who are responsible once again by grooming a child and giving her access to a gun.

 

[Dr. Butt]

he's a cocksucking control-freak asshole, and he dresses like a clown-school reject
no further explanation needed