random_text.txt

[Blackhole]

If you feel down about yourself, remember that you're not a sex offender in the Jail of Fail for incest.

We're building a big, beautiful wall, and Ethan Ralph is going to pay for it.

 

[Meat Target]

All the dead bodies and civilian lives ruined don't make me as sick and disgusted as I am at those pictures.

 

[tehpope]

You'd have to be a low IQ nigger to go to kiwifarms to read serious informative discussions on geopolitics...

 

[Return of the Freaker]

You too cuck for ukrainian wife. She will fuck you inass and you will become pregnant.

 

[Leonard Helplessness]

His Brony credentials are surface level at best, he's lost MLP debates against twelve year olds, for Godssake.

 

[CatParty]

queerosexual gendermancer

 

[Meat Target]

Okay I’m seriously worrying about your mental state at this point.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

Oh no! Who would have thougt that genital multilation doesn't make you feel happy?!

 

[Return of the Freaker]

Has anyone seen one of those terrible pornos where a man can't get a turn on, the woman fails to fake an orgasm and the producer turns out to be their prebubescent son?

 

[Meat Target]

They countermeasured by finding the keys to the Marine's armory and chasing them away from their crayons and loli porn.

I have no expectations beyond them lowering the pet population in whatever neighborhood they move into.

Sucking dick seems to be quite the national pastime.

 

[CobraPlissken]

How painful is being misgendered? Imagine this: a knife has been plunged into your back, and you're slit clean up from buttock to neck, and your spinal chord is ripped from your body - and you're then bent over and buttfucked with your own spine

H/T @AirdropShitposts

 

[KiwiFuzz]

Nigger stop manifesting. Undo this right now.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

I shouldn't be surprised this dude is married to another dude as he clearly has no idea what a woman's genitals are supposed to look like.

 

[Mr Bunny]

What? Nine meals a day? Are you a hobbit?

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

Next up: Dark and Gritty Dora the Explorer reboot, where she uses her magic map to evade Border Patrol to deliver the condoms full of cocaine shoved up her ass to her contacts in the States before the cartels back home saw off Boots’ head.

 

[KiwiFuzz]

Omg literally me, eat your chihuahua fried with street oil for extra flavor

 

[Sinner's Sandwich]

There are witches sending energy to Ukraine and casting innumerable hexes on Putin's penis as we speak

 

[Meat Target]

Well…you see….sneed was selling feed and seed….

They're only taking him prisoner because he's wearing Puma instead of Adidas.

They are fighting for their country and you are shitposting on a tranny fetishist board.

I thought Slavic video games were chugging raw corn likker and hooking their nuts up to car batteries for shits and giggles tbh

 

[PhoBingas]

Personally I think NATO should tell the president of Belarus, decide how your name is spelled, is it Lukashenko or Lukashenka, make up your damn mind or we nuke Minsk

 

[Blackhole]

The Best You'll Every Taste!

You know who Scalfani is? He's the guy in those trashy cookware commercials who fucks up simple stuff before they introduce the gimmicky product.

Jack Scalfani is very unattractive and I would not eat his cooking.

“Ohhhh it’s soooo weeet” and “I can’t believe how wetttttt that is” are not words I want to hear come out of Jack Scalfani’s mouth.

Jack seems like the type of nigga that would scoop a serving size spoonful (or 5) of mayo out the fridge at night and eat it.

jack and his family are pretty much every stereotype non-americans hold of americans

how the hell is MEATER not a gay dating app

The best embalming fluids you'll ever taste.

the scalfanis are every bad american stereotype rolled into a single family

Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn't last very long if you're fat.

When you're some kind of minority, everything negative that happens to you is obviously because you're part of that minority, and not because you're incompetent.

She will be performing the ritual execution of President Zelensky by crushing his skull with spiked high heels in 1440p VR

eighteen naked cowlions at ram ranch

If you really think about it hard Putin is basically Voldemort and the Russian Army is the Death Eaters and Zelenskyy is Harry Potter and the US Marine Core is the Order of the Phoenix and the UN is Katniss from the Hunger Games and the Ukrainian Army is the Avengers and Joseph Biden is Iron Man and the EU is Keanu Reeves.